When I wake up, things have somehow changed. An empty spot next to me in bed reminds me of the night before
, though my memory is hazed. I recall hands, tenderness
and beautiful, great eyes. There’s this smell that makes my heart beat faster, while a clear image of his face pops up in my mind. I close my eyes again, trying to gain control over my breath.
Faces are changing. The atmosphere becomes dreamy. Joints are passed, I blow thick smoke at his face. We laugh about it. Strangers tell me the most personal things, I try to concentrate on what they’re saying. A thin layer of shiny dust seems to cover my hands when I hold them to the light. He takes my hands. We leave.
Taking a shower
, more memories come back to me. With every wave of warm water, I feel his hands caressing my body, kissing me all over. The bathroom light suddenly seems too bright for my eyes, it bothers me I still can’t recall his name.
Our car makes too much noise for the quiet night. Suddenly he stops the car on the side of the road and kisses me. We walk the rest of the way home. In front of my house, he kisses me again. We go inside.
On the floor of my bedroom
I find a dubious little package. Even though it’s empty, I realize it was once filled with drugs
. It doesn’t seem to matter, for he is all I care about right now. Suddenly I find myself lying on the ground. Purple light fills the room. For a moment I think I have an LSD
flashback. Then I pass out.
I whisper his name. He loves me. In a stream of consciousness I fall in love.
I open my eyes to find a small paper with his phone number lying on my desk. The cold wave of joy
makes my head explode. I run outside
to stand in my garden for hours. Just when it starts raining, the phone rings.