I’m horny as hell but desperate for
love.
Craving contact, bitches.
No more
hook-ups. They’re boring me stiff. No more starts to
relationships without a
foundation in something real. I want love. I want something
real. I want that incredible
synergy of friendship evolved into
more.
But damn I also want
anything naked and male.
How completely and utterly, disastrously dysfunctionally
useless.
And I think I’m going
nocturnal on myself.
But the big thing is I can’t bring myself to tell him I want to see him again. Not that there’s any risk. If I don’t then I never will. I tell myself it’s for his sister’s and nieces’ benefit. But in the end, it’s generally a useless prospect; his emails are completely uninteresting, so I doubt it’s worth the effort. It’d probably just suck me into my useless cycle again anyway. Funny how you make contact with someone for three days and really really truly connect. Surprising as hell. I’m not hung up. I just wonder if the fourth day might have been interesting too. And how many more could have stayed interesting after that. Pissed off to not get to find out. I have got to find people who live in my town for once.
I give up.
The End.
Goodnight.