The Twelve Steps of NetHack Anonymous

The relative success of the N.H.A. program seems to be due to the fact that a nethack addict who no longer plays has an exceptional faculty for "reaching" and helping an uncontrolled adventurer.

In simplest form, the N.H.A. program operates when a recovered nethackaholic passes along the story of his or her own problem rampaging, describes the life he or she has found in N.H.A., and invites the newcomer to join the informal Fellowship.

The heart of the suggested program of personal recovery is contained in a Twelve-Step program describing the experience of the earliest members of the Society:

  1. We admitted we were powerless over nethack - that our lives had become unmanageable.
  2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of a co-aligned god as we understood them.
  4. Made a searching and fearless inventory of our +1 bag of holding.
  5. Admitted to our god or goddess, to ourselves and to another adventurer the exact nature of our defeats.
  6. Were entirely ready to have our god vanquish all these defects of alignment and reset our luck.
  7. Humbly asked Him to remove the program from our hard drive, its bones levels from our directory, and its save files from our lives.
  8. Made a list of all trolls, dragons, zruties, nagas, mimics, unicorns, and other enemies we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
  9. Made direct amends to monsters wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others of like alignment.
  10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were slain not look at the high score list.
  11. Sought through META-prayer to improve our conscious contact with our god or goddess as we understood them, META-praying only for a named weapon, instrument, or musical notes.
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this scroll to nethack-addicts, to (r)ead it when memory fades, and to practice these principles in all our quests.

Newcomers are not asked to accept or follow these Twelve Steps in their entirety if they feel unwilling or unable to do so.

They will usually be asked to keep an open mind, to attend meetings at which recovered nethackaholics describe their personal experiences in achieving ascension, and to read N.H.A. literature describing and interpreting the N.H.A. program.

N.H.A. members will usually emphasize to newcomers that only problem players themselves, individually, can determine whether or not they are in fact addicts.

At the same time, it will be pointed out that all available medical testimony indicates that nethack addiction is a progressive illness, that it cannot be cured in the ordinary sense of the term, but that it can be arrested through total abstinence from rogue-like games in any form.