Salisbury steak (thing)

Ah, but who do we have to thank for this culinary delight?

Why, it was none other than someone by the name of Dr. James Salisbury who put the Salisbury in Salisbury steak.

Humble beginnings

We have to go all the way back to the American Civil War when diarrhea was rampant among the troops in the field. Enter the good doctor who was one of the first advocates here in the States to promote the idea that a good diet was the pathway to good health. Unfortunately Salisbury thought that a steady diet of coffee and chopped beefsteak would cure the troops of the trots and that other dietary staples such as vegetables, fruits and starches were the main cause of what was ailing them. In addition to diarrhea, he surmised that those culprits also were responsible for such things as heart disease, mental illness and tuberculosis.

His recipe was quite simple. It consisted of ground beef mixed with onions and some seasonings. It was then to be deep fried or boiled and fed to the troops three times a day. I can hear my stomach rumbling as I type this.

Modern times

I guess that one could say that over time the Salisbury steak has “evolved”. Today, you can usually find some in the frozen food section of your friendly neighborhood grocery store. As far as nutritional value is concerned, according to our friends over at Wiki, the USDA requires that packaged Salisbury steak has to contain a minimum of 65% meat. At first I found that somewhat comforting but then upon further reading I was disturbed to discover that of that 65 percent, up to 25 percent of it can be pork and no more than 30% of the steak can be fat. Although the use of meat byproducts is strictly verboten, don’t be surprised if your Salisbury steak contains some beef heart.

If you think that’s confusing, wait until we get to the use of “extenders” like bread crumbs, flour, oats and other assorted non meat like products. It seems they must only make up to 12 percent of the steak. Unless of course were talking about soy protein. Then you can only use 6.8%.

The rest of this delicacy usually consists of binders like milk, cream or eggs.

The USDA also requires that the product be fully cooked before being sold to the salivating Salisbury steak lovers amongst us or else it has to be labeled “Patties for Salisbury Steak”.

On a somewhat more personal note, my love affair with the Salisbury steak occurred shortly after my first divorce. I was, after all a bachelor and living life on the run. It was quick, easy and maybe most importantly, cheap. Who gave a shit about how it tasted?

My love affair ended as I matured and my palate got a bit more refined. However, I’m willing to bet that if I dig deep enough into the dark recesses of my freezer, there’s a package of them, most likely freezer burned beyond recognition just waiting to be opened and consumed.

Heaven help me should that day ever come.

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