Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "originally it was me, but then I was watching the events, a non-existent cult movie in which a man with a Return of the Jedi-style scooter faced a has-been pop star (played by Kid Rock), who has been transformed by a comic-book style accident into a misguided demigod."

• So then I tried staring into the abyss, but it got distracted by a weasel and ditched me
• I stared into the muddled sky with tears running down my face in small rivers, and I knew then that there was no hope
• For every rich man who tries to leave this world for a better one with his fancy tomb surrounded by mourners, there are many more who perish alone in the cold, forgotten by all but God.
• I was discovered by scientists, what will they call me?
• Food which was intended as such by nature
• There was a Man Dwelt by a Churchyard
• Tell me a story about a burro, standing atop a mesa, surrounded by a flock of geese, being fed by a weathered old man wearing nothing but a Jimmy hat
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• By evening I will have returned all traces that I was ever here
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• My lunch money was stolen by a predatory Mars rover
• my mind has long been gnawed by the cankering tooth of mystery
• No one has ever been bitten to death by a poisonous snake in a ball pit
• I was taken by a honeymoon scam
• Tribute to the Man Who Never Was (document)
• it was years before they met again, by chance
• I was the man who never lied. I never lied until today.
• Jacques Chirac was shot in the head by a fascist named Jean-Marie Le Pen
• She was most amazed by the obvious, like January and the fact that I could not possibly keep her.
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• It was too late by the time the robots came and I couldn't, I just couldn't
• surrounded by stars, her dark hair blending into the fabric of the night sky
• I remember when it was me who made her toilet flush
• Of Gods and Men: Who Was This Man Called the Christ?
• Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
• Sitting next to strangers who fall asleep by me for no reason. Trusting rhythm. An odd intimacy, train trips.
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• So says the preacher man, but... I don't go by what he says
• I Was Kidnapped By Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
• What was stolen by someone else
• she was waylaid by an octopus
• Just standing there, wearing my boxers, in my driveway. I was watching the stormfront. You were watching me.
• I remember when it was me who made you want to take over the world and enslave humanity
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• She's smarter than me but she's also more quiet, therefore she has no personality which makes me feel better
• Or he'll just kick me in the face and scream abstract noises and dance around outside in his underwear and have sex with the neighbor's dog and try to fly by jumping off the toilet
• The Story of the Envious Man and of Him Who Was Envied
• the magic that was meant to capture the outlaw instead transformed him into a monster
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• This statement has not been evaluated by the FDA
• No important data was harmed by the ILOVEYOU worm
• The rock under my foot that told me I was real when I was an adult
• My first and last attempt at a one night stand was raided by the police
• If you become lucid, you realize history's greatest literature was being written as you read it ...by yourself.
• The Man Felt an Iron Hand Grasp Him by the Hair, at the Nape. Not One Hand, a Hundred Hands Seized Him, Each by the Hair, and Tore Him Head to Foot, the Way You Tear Up a Sheet of Paper, Into Hundreds of Little Pieces
• The Scots Confession: Chapter 18
• The ringing has been drowned out by voices
• I was raised by the French government
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever here
• They know me not by name, but numbers
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• That Thursday the Universe was curved in the morning and was flat again by afternoon
• How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
• My Singing was Stolen by Whispers to a False Friend
• Meanwhile, the PILOT, who has been laughing hysterically through the entire sequence, finally loses it. He falls out of his chair and bangs his head against the panel, causing the ship to lose control and crash into a nearby planet
• It was men who made breasts into a secret.
• The Man Who Was (user)
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever a bear
• smiling in photographs was a concept introduced by Kodak
• In the movie of his life, the part of Keanu Reeves will be played by a block of wood, and the critics will pan it for being too expressive
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• every secret thing was made by some one
• It was 30 years ago today, Miyamoto taught the kids to play... (e2poll)
• I said I was sorry. Then she looked at me.
• Then again, maybe he was recruiting for a cult
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• man when you are telling me how it was
• Death was a part of me then, too.
• There was a man who lived a life of fire
• The Man Who Was Thursday
• He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
• On getting blown up 8000 miles from home by a man who does not own shoes
• I remember when it was me who made her skin flush
• She was watching me and I didn’t know it.
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• jealousy, which has been a sort of game you played with yourself, now grips you relentlessly.
• the fire burned and burned; it was so great and now so much time has passed and the fire is still burning, but it requires attendance
• I washed dishes with the Chinese FBI then was an extra in a cursed movie
• The male libido - or - How I was castrated by the 90's
• unfortunately, his entire corpus was composed in English, and so has been lost to the ravages of time
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• Old man who lived by the crick
• Music that is either by the Sonic Youth or by some band that is ripping off the Sonic Youth, but you can't tell which
• I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
• everyone who ever told me i was pretty was lying.
• we went to the stars, but all we found was ourselves
• Electronically, I was questioned by a mallard of flame…
• I was hit by a train that doesn't really exist
• The German textbook that was written by Morrissey
• She wakes me up by tickling my feet
• Pounded In The Butt By My Book "Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt"
• Discover me so by faint indirections
• Those who are as a light in the darkness shall ever be troubled by moths
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• Something to remember me by
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• Anyone could know just by watching her silent moves
• Call by value return
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• Feminism, as influenced by the world around me
• every horse can be tamed by someone. but they don't always live at the same time.
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• watching headlights roll by, maybe you noticed one, swept by a little too slow
• So many people have come and gone, their faces fade as the years go by
• don't judge a book by its movie
• /but what was the question?
• Judging women by their books
• Man Getting Hit by Football
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• there are people who are gone but wanted me to be happy
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• Do not put this product into the rectum by using fingers or any mechanical device or applicator
• This music crept by me upon the waters
• Yet is there hope, then Love but play thy part
• just because it was an accident doesn't mean it'll come back to life
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• Discovering personalities by watching people with their dogs
• One by one we threw our eyes into the sea
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• Swimming pool injury
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• 1970's fashions (by someone who wore 'em)
• The difference between "call by reference" and "call by value return"
• i thought i was special, but it was you
• By the way, she has a penis; just so you know.
• To One who has been Long in City Pent
• The Box Said 'Do NOT Open" But The Seal Was Already Broken
• Stand by Me
• Now let's see what has happened to us by adopting a sedentary lifestyle
• Being solicited for sex by people who don't even know your gender
• being beaten into an unhealthy state by other people's pasts
• Not really by the rules, but...
• Every new technology has been endowed with the potential to transform society
• Rocked by Rape
• Grace and Fury walk with you, call each by name when the other has failed
• by people who know what salsa should taste like
• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• Watching the world go by
• The Who By Numbers
• cancer kids hangin around out by the trains
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• the illusion of conviction offered by rock music, drugs, and contemporary poetry
• A man is known by the company he keeps.
• These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
• Your face by starlight
• The Punk Meets the Godfather, Part One: Do My Converse look okay? And other preconceptions by a hippie kid
• You can get to my heart by making me cry
• A regiment of intellectual ghosts walks the streets of this working class city, casting dignity, reason, and courage into each soul they pass by
• The Goonies vs. Stand By Me
• Loneliness is but a myth dispelled by you
• The woman had a carnivorous frenzy which could only be soothed by the succulent sirloin
• My life has suddenly been decided for me
• The lost man by the wayside
• The South (as played by Billy Hodge) Rises Again
• Your job is to find kitten. This task is complicated by the existence of various things which are not kitten.
• You find yourself being chased not only by the bad guys, but also by what should be the good guys
• Our desire to remember has been fragmented into a thousand slices
• i can't fit it all in but by god, i will keep trying
• Noding for Numbers sure was silly, but it sure is better than Dada Fascism
• Everything always comes back to me. Everything has always been my fault
• A Book about Me, by Me Myself
• It was a dream. But it wasn't a dream.
• play it by ear
• Stand by Your Man
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• The classic Warner Brothers cartoon characters have been replaced by lookalikes
• Supporting your views on modern social dynamics by citing anthropology
• Gap analysis of a telephone call
• Help! My sister's been abducted by Christians!
• I got hit by the pizza man
• Hey, stop distracting me by rubbing lotion on your legs
• he touched me then, but I forgot to feel
• You can judge a movie by its poster
• These women who must live like the high Sierra white pine, fed somehow by the alpine wind
• Don't Pass Me By
• He makes me feel alone just by being there
• There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
• Rules by which a great empire may be reduced to a small one
• You meant for this node to be read by me, and I would like to respond

If you Log in you could create a "originally it was me, but then I was watching the events, a non-existent cult movie in which a man with a Return of the Jedi-style scooter faced a has-been pop star (played by Kid Rock), who has been transformed by a comic-book style accident into a misguided demigod." node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.