I dreamed I was driving in the country. I was angry and frustrated because I was lost. My two sons were with me, making disgusting jokes and being crude. They wouldn't shut up and I didn't want to take my bad mood out on them when they were having such a good time. So I kept it to myself and just simmered along.

I am two people: It was a semi-lucid dream where I went to my old college town (like I do every weekend) to play D&D and such. When I got there, though, I ran into me, who explained to me that I was using my other body on the weekends and that my other body still lived in the college town. I was upset with me because I kept taking over my body every weekend. I'm looking for a place to live. Part of me wants to disappear back into my old college town, like everyone else seems to.

Gigantic transparent spider: In a segue from the previous dream, I was late for class. For this class, I had to complete a science project involving a spider. I think that originally it was only an observation project, but I came up with the idea of genetically engineering a gigantic transparent spider that would be easier to observe. The spider had some other wierd qualities, though. Every night, its legs (which weren't transparent) would fall off, and every morning, it would grow new ones. It also never stopped growing. Towards the end of the dream, I got a cumulative case of the heebie-jeebies.

Coffee with Helene Cixous on what must be the banks of some river more important. We speak in muffled tones, in fluent french and broken english. The setting sun is only everything I can see. Barely an outline. Such a roar. This coffee tastes like something else, and in that dreamishly qualified way, its no matter.

Suddenly she is shouting and reading and laughing and it's all very surreal. It is how nothing has ever been said. Mais, il me rends comme les pleurs. Ecriture feminine indeed Helene.

This is all rather rudely interrupted by a disembodied voice informing me that Elton John spent well over four hundred thousand dollars on flowers in a year. What can be said? The man likes his flowers.

tricia and i are somewhere in shannon's high-rise apartment with my friends. i leave her with my friends to go to the bathroom and return to find her doing cocaine. she asks me if i'll do some with her, and i agree.

. . .

i'm on some high school track in the middle of a frozen, snow-covered tundra. everyone i know is with me here. we're all alternately running, jumping, talking, and monitoring the cameras which are making a music video out of the whole thing based on complex algorithms. tricia and i walk outside the track to find a dark, dark forest. it is sectioned off by a giant piece of saran wrap in a huge wooden frame. we tear through it with our car keys. on the other side, a good walking distance away, is a haunted house set up by aliens, which consists of tiny tunnels and tiny doorways. outside the funhouse in the snow are the heads and decapitated bodies of long-extinct animals, like three-horned rams. their blood makes the snow stain red and it smells like death here.

. . .

i wake up to find the previous dreams were just that. i'm in my room, almost dozing off on a giant red balloon, when i hear my mother telling my sister that i've failed her. she knows about my drug use and intends to rehabilitate me herself. i go absolutely apeshit when she asks me to come outside my room and talk to her. i rip the door off the hinges and throw it down the stairs, declaring that she might as well take my door, as she has stolen my privacy forever.

At the party the hors d’oeuvres
were lilies floating in the pond.

The hungry guests left only one for me.
It was my party, but I had not ordered
the lilies.

Some of the guests started shouting
and shoving; then there was a fracas.

I slipped out to the terrace with my first love,
where she was sweeter and more beautiful
than I could believe.

But when I told her of my love,
she giggled (O that voice!) and offered me the last lily.

I smuggled it upstairs under my coat
and peeled it open under the bathroom fluorescent.
The skin was warm and fleshy, and underneath

was chocolate: a lacquered chocolate schemata
of the uterus, ovaries and fallopian tubes.

There was a pounding on the door
which swung open to reveal
my second, third and fifth loves,

who were dead confections, come to warn me:

Your fourth love is trapped in the basement
(they said).

And I billowed out the window
to the green coast,
where I lived on cockles and squid,
and grew old.

One day I saw a mermaid
in the telescope, and gathered my ministers
for a sea-hunt,

for they loved a hunt.
We took after her in our fastest speedboat,
my ministers so dashing in their gray cloaks.

She dipped beneath the waves and returned
not a woman, but a horse.
Wailing and gnashing their teeth,

my ministers turned the boat around.
And I had to beg them to steer clear
of the rocks,
so clean was their despair.

This is the first time I've ever noded a dream, thought I'd give it a shot. I never really liked listening to other peoples dreams (I find them really boring), so I don't usually tell other people my dreams, but I figure, what the hell, you don't have to read this if you don't want to. It was a very long dream, and it was really vivid and I didn't realize that I had the imagination to come up with it.

It started in Paris, at the Eifel Tower. (NOTE: I've never been to France, but a lot of my friends have been there recently and they tell me about it. I wanted to go, but I don't have the money) I was at the lower level and was watching all the people below, it was kind of festival like. I sat there for a while before going inside the tower to climb to the upper levels. It was really nice inside, like a building, not a monstrous tower of steel. I went past a lot of historical panels that described the tower and all that, I ignored them. Then I saw some really beautiful paintings that were supposedly done from the tower. They were very nice paintings, looked Impressionist I guess, but they were totally made up out of my head. Then I climbed higher up the tower on red-carpeted stairs. I went past huge ballrooms and more paintings. In the dream my legs were getting extremely tired and heavy. When I woke up later, that was the weirdest part, that my legs could get really tired in a dream. Eventually I got to the next level but I had to pay more to go the rest of the way. I gave him my credit card even though I knew I wouldn't be able to pay for it later. I woke up about then.

I dream that I'm waking up on a raft in the middle of an ocean. I stand up on the raft, as if waking up here is normal.
I stare into the distance, it's morning time, the sun is rising. The horizon looks explosive in magentas and deep blues.

I can't remember the last time I saw a real surise.

I jump off the raft into the water to wake up, and the water is more viscous than water should be. The consistence of this water was much thicker than water like it had been cut with a thickener. So I get out of the ocean, and lie on th cot to dry, and as the sun rise it get's hotter and hotter, and I'm getting sunburnt very quickly (I've never been sunburnt in real life, I'm very dark skinned).

That's all I remember about that, but at one point I know I was talking to my mother, and I was in a wheelchair, and we both were sitting in front of a very large fireplace.

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