"hi... i'm tftv256, and i have a problem. i'm a malloc abuser.
"all my strings are fixed-length but they're all dynamically allocated. the thought of declaring a char array boggles my mind. arrays? what are those? i even find myself doing malloc(1)'s twice a day. i look at myself in the mirror and i dont like what i see. so i do some more mallocs to escape reality. ENOMEM, ENOMEM, ENOMEM, damnit don't do this to me now. just one more hit. just one more hit, man!"
"'oh, sure', you could be thinking, 'that's not me. i only malloc a string here and there.' that was me too. but sooner or later character pointers weren't good enough. they say the char * is the gateway cast. damn straight; sooner or later i found myself casting mallocs to structs and pointers to pointers, and then so far as to pointers to struct pointer pointers. they asked me why i was doing all this; i told them all them asterisks look pretty. that's not cool. i passed out, almost dumped core, man. they sent me to rehab and now i'm here. it'll happen to you too..."
** fades to black **
This message from Partnership for a Malloc-Free America