I've decided that I need to see a
psychologist, at least once to determine what, if anything, is wrong with me. I'm waiting to start until next
semester since I'll be home for a while and really don't want to tell my mom that I'm going to seek
professional help.
So then I started thinking, what makes it necessary for someone to seek help? When do you cross that boundary? I know I've crossed it a long time ago, but I'm not sure when.
- I've been struggling off and on with your garden variety eating disorder since age 11.
- Sometimes I play with scissors and razor blades on my legs.
- The last time I felt truly rejected, I nearly drank myself to death.
- I routinely lay in bed and cry for no reason.
- The other night, the suicidal thoughts started.
I used to proud of being
fucked up but now I'm just sick of it. I'd like to lead a normal life already.