Hell of a thing to keep you occupied on a friday night, eh?

Last night a call went out to the Prudence Island Volunteer Fire Department (of which I am almost, not quite yet a member). Volunteers were requested to search the beaches and waters on the northern end of the island to look for a 57 year old man in an eight-foot skiff who hadn't been seen for several hours. Having little better to do, and being one of those schmucks who volunteers for this shit regularly, I started walking the beaches with some other folks, looking for a waving hand or (more likely) a floating corpse.

Nothing.

I retired several hours later. The next morning, lo and behold, the man was found, safe and sound! THE INCONSIDERATE MOTHERFUCKER WENT TO THE MAINLAND TO GET A FLASHLIGHT AND DIDN'T CALL HIS WIFE WHO PANICKED AND CALLED THE RESCUE.

It is shit like this that will deter me from marriage for the rest of my natural life.