You heathens use
water in tea? Do you come from the
countryside or something? Everyone with any taste eats the leaves straight from the plant (not just any plant of course, but special
Sri Lankan - or
Ceylon - black-leaf creeping hybrids, grown at 3000 feet above sea level by monks so disciplined that they never even
blink). You must stand up and sing the
national anthem before and after each cup... (A-HA! That was a test - no water remember?!
Eat them off the tree!). Any biscuits must be tested in a
Ministry of Defence approved wind tunnel.
However, a suitable alternative method for scu... people who watch ITV is as follows :
Standard Method :
Put water in kettle.
Boil kettle.
Locate a mug and a spoon.
Clean them.
Place teabag and sugar (optional) in mug.
Wait for kettle to boil.
Pour boiling water in mug.
Smoosh about a bit with spoon.
Locate milk.
Throw away manky milk.
Steal or purchase fresh milk.
Remove teabag from mug. (Squeezing it if you must)
Throw spent bag in bin / sink / pile of festering plates.
Add milk to tea.
Drink, dunking digestive biscuits (for no longer than 1.8 seconds) as necessary.
For construction workers, lorry drivers :
Open Thermos.
Pour. (into a cup obviously)
Drink, pausing to whistle at passing "dollybirds".
I recommend PG Tips, at least over supermarket own brand.
(For the poncy sort of tea, locate an elderly relative and offer to listen their lengthy anecdotes. This also has the upside of being free. And you get a better class of biscuit as well.)