Well, my
life sucks. Not really, but
wallowing in self-pity feels simply delicious.
My first and only
boyfriend so far has dumped me in a way that defines the phrase "
painful break-up." Supposedly, this stuff gets easier with practice. I don't think I want to try this out-- in fact,
enforced celibacy sounds good right about now. ((shrugs)) Not that I really have to worry about boys falling all over themselves to attract my attention; I must either have a major case of the uglies, or the general demeanor of a
homicidal maniac. I hope it's the second, though I was going for more of a "
sociopath" vibe than "
psychopath."
So, what am I doing to get over it all? Work myself into exhaustion with school, mainly. Well, that and listen to
Joy Division,
Bauhaus, and
The Cure.
Emo is for pussies who can't handle real emotional trauma. (Yes, that was
sarcasm for anyone out there actually bothering to read this thing. And that's
Emo, not
Eno.) Em and Melissa are trying to cheer me up, but it ain't workin'. I don't do
casual blowjobs, and to be frank, I'm pretty convinced I'm actually an
emotional cripple.
Looking on the bright side... my parents
put the dog to sleep while I was away at school. Yeah.
That's the fucking bright side. Life is such a fucking wonderful thing, isn't it? Good god, don't read any more of this, or you might be pulled into the
black cloud of despair that shadows my every breath. Riiight.....
I need a
Guinness, a
backrub, and three hours alone with a
punching bag. That, or
someone who feels like slapping me out of this little endless loop of stupidity I've managed to trap myself in. If anyone you know can supply any of the above,
let me know. Oh hell. No one ever reads these things anyways.