The result of extreme boredom in English 103-S. (S for it being a science majors course). We were discussing sonnets, iambic pentameter, and the difference in rhyme scheme between Shakespearian and Petrarchan sonnets. To demonstrate the form of a shakespearian sonnet--
--he wrote up a list of random, sample rhyming words on the board, in that pattern.

Someone randomly joked 'hey we should write a sonnet with *that*! But that was soon forgotten as he continued teaching. However, i've studied shakespeare and i've studied sonnets until both were going to come out my ears, i understand the stupid iams, and so being bored i took up the challange. Next class period, this is going to appear, on 'parchment' (browned tracing paper), hand-penned with a quill, on the desk before class. Here goes nothing, but nothing in true iambic form -_- ... (bolded words were the sample words i had to start with and could not change.

Sonnet 103

Good afternoon class. Now, my name is Neal
With Shakespeare, Milton, we will have a ball
I hope you find these works to have ap-peal
All worthy authors, both those short and tall

To introduce you to these works I wish
Swift values human life like that of dog
Is the mother of Vardaman a fish?
Richard slaughtered men as he would the hog

Lady, tiger, always stuck in limbo
Read *well*! TV will turn your brain to mush
130--to true love, or to bimbo?
You didn't read today, did you? Tush, tush

All this I hope you learn here, taught by me--
"Excuse me, 'fessor, can I please go pee?"