Texas cockroaches are not like your wussie little Ohio cockroaches. Texas cockroaches are big. As an added bonus, the suckers fly.

I have a terror of cockroaches larger than 1/2 inch in length, to the extent I have a hard time getting close enough to kill them. I have nightmares about them crawling in my ears. I cannot watch the "They're Creeping Up On You" segment of Creepshow. I can't watch any of Joe's Apartment.

The only time a platonic roommate has ever seen me naked was when I found one in my towel after a shower. I came streaking out of there screaming "THERE'S A ROACH IN THE BATHROOM THE SIZE OF A GOAT!!! Oh, kill it kill it kill it, pleeeeeeaassee kill it!"

Laughing, she killed it and flushed it.

But that roach never touched me.

So you can imagine my reaction when a 2-inch-long roach decided that my face (well, my glasses) would be a lovely place to land this evening.

Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.

After taking a shower and washing my hair and spraying my glasses down with alcohol, I feel somewhat better. I am still royally creeped out, though, and really have to talk to my dad about getting an exterminator for this place. He's something of an environmentalist and hates spreading poison in the world, so he eschews Roundup for pulling weeds and just tries to keep the place clean so the roaches won't want to come around. This is Texas, so you get bugs of all kinds due to the warm weather. And I totally agree with his environmental concerns ... to a point.

Ew.