A series of books geared towards pre-teen girls about its title topic, babysitting. Aside from the fact that it's unthinkably surreal, it has no literary value and makes me book-shy.

5 13-year-old girls and 2 11-year-old girls form a club that bonds them together by their only interest, babysitting. No one cares that these girls are barely teens (and some aren't even), they are the most respected babysitters in Stoneybrook, Connecticut. Everyone loves The Babysitters Club. I mean, where else are you going to find pre-teens who know all about responsibility? They don't even flip on the damn television a single time. They bake cookies and do little activities. And why are these kids so nice? It's like Stoneybrook is dangerously underpopulated when it comes to bratty children. I wish I knew of a 4-year-old who really was eager to take a nap.

The characters even have personalities. Imagine that.

  • Kristy - president of the club, wears sweat pants and a red baseball cap, and loves sports. Doesn't date very often.
  • Mary-Ann - stepsister of Dawn. Is shy, caring, and deeply devoted to her boyfriend Logan (who might I add looks at least 17 in the television series. WTF?)
  • Dawn - stepsister of Mary-Ann. Is a nature freak. Not only is a vegetarian, but she's a tree-hugger too!
  • Claudia - Supposedly the crazy junk-food obsessed artist. She's terrible at math, she's Stacey's best friend, and she's boy-crazy.
  • Stacey - The most unique of them all (and that's not very unique). She's from New York, is diabetic, and is a model (but on television, she dresses trashy)
  • Jessie - The African-America. She's into ballet and complains about her younger sister a lot. Oh yeah, she's 11.
  • Mallory - A red-head. 11 years old. Comes from a family of 7 children (and triplets!).

My personal knowledge is embarrassing enough here. There must be at least 100 books in the regular series, 30 in the "mystery" series and 15 in the super special series. The mystery series were self-explanatory and the super specials involved different situations like vacations, and happened to be twice as long as a regular book.

FORTUNATELY, Ann M. Martin doesn't write these books anymore because she moved on with her life. Now she writes teen diaries, and bad ones at that. I'd like to write her a letter that goes something like this, "Dear Ann M. Martin: NEWS FLASH! There are no gay kids in Palo Alto, California named Duck."