I'm hungry, and have no food in the house. Time to go to the grocery store. Grab my cell phone, my cigarettes and lighter, and my key--wait, where are my keys?

They're not next to the keyboard. They're not behind the keyboard, and they didn't get shoved under the keyboard. Dammit, I've been noding all night and I'm HUNGRY.

I check under the desk; nope, not on the floor. Check around the base of my chair; dammit, not there either. I search my bed, shaking out the bunch of sheet and blanket. No dice. God dammit, I'm hungry, I'm almost out of cigarettes, I'm craving caffine, and I can't do a fucking thing about it! Check between the desk and the table. Lots of empty Pall Mall filter boxes, a bottle of acetaminophen (better put that on my desk again, God only know when I'll have my next headache), but absolutly no fucking trace of my goddamn key ring! Christ, I could find an honest politician faster than I could my damn keys.

Check the floor behind my chair, next to my bed. Hey, there's the remote control I misplaced. I've only been getting up to change the channel for two hours. Well, might as well put that on my desk too. If I ever find my keys and get food and cigs, I might want to use that. Hey! What's this next user the newpaper that on top of my dictionary? My keys! <Singing>Oh,Happy Days Are Here Again!</Singing>

Figures I find everything in the last place I look. Oh well, I should be putting them in that thing my aunt gave me, anyway.

This really does happen to me all the time. The urgency of my need is inversely proportional to the liklyhood I'll find what I'm looking for in a reasonal amount of time.

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