If I ever got a girlfriend, the first place I would take her to see would be the aquarium.

Once, when I was about eight years old, I asked my grandma what suicide was. I was obsessed with suicide and I thought about it all the time. But I didn't kill myself. I didn't kill myself, because I was the best thing that ever happened to my mum. My grandma told me that if I hadn't been born my mum would have killed herself a long time ago. Thats the only reason I am still alive to this day.

Also when I was about eight years old, my mum took me to the aquarium. It was the only time I had ever seen her happy. It was not the dazed, bubbly happiness brought on by the use of opiates. She had no hookup in Vancouver, so she was sober, and for once we had cash to spare, so we stayed at a hotel for a day. At the aquarium I saw so many wonderful, alienlike creatures which I could never seen have seen in my wildest dreams. It was like having my eyes opened to a fantastic, mystical world. At the end of it all, she bought me a little plush dolphin. It was great. I was so happy. I even took the dolphin doll to school with me everyday, and it would comfort me as I hid from bullies in the toilet cubicle every lunchtime, until the day I lost it.

Yes, the first place I would take my future girlfriend to see would be the aquarium. I know I will never experience that happiness again. But at least I would like to relive those days and share it with her.

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