This is my mom's reply to the note I wrote her (I was born this way):

July 8, 2000

Dear Randy,

I appreciate very much your little "snippit" from your online diary. It helps Mom a lot to know what your thinking and how you feel. I'm sorry you feel like I give so many speeches, I am really only trying to reach out to you.

I do agree that a lot of times it is much easier to write how you feel about a subject than to talk about it. In this situation, we are very emotional and we do tend to cry when discussing it.

I just want to reassure you how much I love you and to enforce to you that I would do anything for you. I want you to understand that I don't love you in spite of you being gay. I just love you and I will always love you.

The things that upset me are the very same things that upset you. I know your life will not be easy and I know that it is tuff when you are different from the "norm", but at your age it is also tuff just "being" - sometimes. I won't even guess how painful and difficult it is to go through what a gay person goes through.

The most important thing to me is that you know that you can come to me under any circumstance, any time, and any place - to discuss any thing you want to discuss or to talk about any problem you may have. I may not know the answer or I may not even understand but I will love you and listen to you and try to help you as much as I can. This is not because you are gay but because you are Randy.

I don't think you realize it but I very seldom ever thing about the gay part, but I think about you all the time. Even though it may seem like it to you, not everything revolves around a persons sexual preference. Average straight people very seldom go around announcing that they are average, straight, people. You are very special in your own right, and your sexual preference doesn't take that away from you. And one more thing, if I had the option of being me and straight or being you and gay, I would be you without hesitation.

The thing that scares me is in that one page you mentioned gay suicide and kill myself.. Honey, that really is not an option and if you ever feel that way, I want you to let me know so I can help you.

Also, please get past this thing of everytime I talk to you or correct you, it's because of the gay thing. Again, it's the Randy thing.

I love you,

It was a nice note in theory, but she still treated me the same way she did before...

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