Jesus had no wheels or shoulder pads on his cross

Imagine if you will a rather friendly looking man, with blue eyes and a head full of blond curls. He's wearing a robe, not dissimilar to something you'd see in a biblical B-movie, and on his feet are sandals. And white tube socks1. Across his shoulder he is hauling a big wooden cross, somewhat like the one Jesus is supposed to have been nailed to. And he is going on a mission.

Moses Hansen (or Mogens Hansen, as he was originally named2) is a self proclaimed preacher and savior, born in Denmark sometime in the 1940'es or thereabouts3 and raised on the Danish island of Bornholm. His early years weren't as holy as all that; he left his job as a teacher - and his wife and home - and started traipsing around the world, abusing alcohol and what other substances he came across. Working his way around the globe he ended up in New Zealand a washed out alcoholic, ready to end his life then and there. He did try, but his attempt failed due to him being too intoxicated.

Instead of dying he found Jesus, somewhere on a mountain slope, and decided to start doing "the right thing". He went back to Denmark via Chicago, where he revisited and subsequently married a girl named Joy, whom he had impregnated during an earlier visit! The two are still married, and have six children.

In Denmark Moses Hansen is probably best known for his "crusades", one of which involved hauling this bigass cross through Nørrebro, a multiethnic part of Copenhagen whith a fairly large Muslim population. He was protesting against what he claimed to be a Muslim plan to eradicate the ethnically Danish part of Nørrebro's population, and turn the district into a Muslim district. He had allegedly found out about the plans from a flyer, which he had accidentally obtained. The "translation" was posted on his website, but for some odd reason he refused to produce the original flyer to show the stunned public.

In 2003 Moses Hansen went on the air in the Danish production of the Tv-show "Big Brother". Within days he was removed from the set because the other contestants felt uneasy or freaked out by him. He openly admitted to having masturbated more or less in front of an 8 year old boy, flung his baby daughter into a wall, and thrown a knife at his wife - who, luckily managed to duck. He says he is very sorry for having done these things, and that he has mended his ways since, but he has also been quoted for saying that pedophilia is not really harmful if done in a "responsible way", and that it will become generally accepted within the next ten to fifteen years..

Every year he hauls his 3m tall cross around somewhere in Denmark - and abroad - trying to raise money and/or attention for some cause or another. Often dressed in a sweatshirt that sports the Israeli flag on the front he wanders far and wide for his faith - a faith that is a muddled mix-up of different passages from The Old and The New Testament, liberally sprinkled with his own interpretations of what's good and right.

His - as I see them - hateful shenanigans are attracting a lot of attention. In the name of Jesus he is making war on just about everything, including but not restricted to abortion, Islam, homosexuals, and porn. He has actually declared jihad on Islam (in February, 2006), leading to his own congregation Apostolsk Kirkesamfund denouncing him publically for fanning the fires of violence and intolerance!

Soldier of Jesus indeed.

  1. The white tube socks may very well be my imagination. Remembering him with white tube socks in sandals pretty much wraps up my opinion of the man!
  2. Allegedly his name, 'Mogens', was too hard to pronounce outside the Nordic countries, so it ended up as 'Moses'. Sounds perfectly reasonable.
  3. I have not been able to find a date of birth, but I believe it was around this time.

I have found my information by living in Denmark and watching television. Here is his story in his own words. In Danish.

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