Findings:
- The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
- Removed from humanity, I realized I was just another distraction
- Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
- She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
- nor was there anything to be attained that you didn't already have
- I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
- He was there, and then he wasn't, and with him went those memories
- Women you know you should just walk away from
- That's Just How He Was
- I'm Rudy Giuliani! I was mayor of New York on 9/11! I Should Be The President!
- He wasn't programmed to be a tenor, he was programmed to be a physician!
- Beautiful things should be left alone lest they become just another thing that we should throw away.
- I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
- I was less than one hundred footsteps away from you I suppose
- I married him because he was not mean
- He was confirming to himself that they were laughing with him after all
- I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
- One should be careful to whom he gives the finger
- It was the tree that gave him away.
- He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
- The last girl I dated was a vegetarian. We couldn't go anywhere and so it just didn't work out.
- I used to think of sobriety as a purgatory, and that to be under the influence of drugs was relief from it. Now that I'm older I believe the opposite to be true.
- The girl didn't know if she was loved until he said yes.
- I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
- An ocean away and here he was, seeping into her
- born under candlelight just from the edge of a knife, was it a life? or was it a light at all?
- When he was five, his father made him murder his imaginary friend.
- All he left her was alone
- As I looked back, he was reveling in his own feces
- hodgepodge was just a one-night stand, apparently
- The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
- If I was any good at this, I would be getting paid
- He dreamt he was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty bed
- I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
- This wasn't how it was supposed to be
- some say he was never here at all
- I'm sorry, I didn't realize God was on campus today
- making certain he was touching her
- With him it was always like
- The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
- It was something that sand out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
- we just can't give 'em away!
- Donald Duck was banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants
- She grew a little older, while he was telling her
- How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
- this is unlike the story it was written to be
- The Scots Confession: Chapter 18
- The first time I saw him was I emit tsal ehT
- I don't think I was rude to her, just cold and curt
- (because this was always subconsciously the inspiration, even if I did not know it at the time, and I only realised it just now)
- The one thing I wanted more than anything was for someone, just once, to tell me they don't know what they'd do without me
- she was just the dry smell of gasoline
- If I was a woman I'd be a feminist too
- If all you did was node, your writeups wouldn't be very interesting, would they?
- To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring - it was peace.
- What's the point of having doors if you're just going to give away keys?
- I was supposed to be dead when this picture was taken
- I was shaking, but not from the cold
- It was daylight when you looked up from your ditch
- So there I was, naked and hiding, facing the dissertation committee from the Isle of Lesbos
- The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
- all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
- So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
- Mr. Lunch liked to chase birds. In fact, he was a professional.
- He Was a Crook
- He was an ant on an ill-defined mission. She was the trapdoor spider of love.
- It was a reasonable chat, I let him have it alone
- I was trying to show him my insides, you know. I like to share.
- Maybe That's Just As It Should Be
- This guy in the computer lab who looks like he should be a doctor
- The sparkle of this angled blossoming was invading the Earth, and Vug said, "It's spring!" I kissed him.
- Where's the kaboom?
- There was never supposed to be an Episode 7, 8, or 9
- all it cost him was a Penny
- It was just a crush
- just because it was an accident doesn't mean it'll come back to life
- Was the Black Death really just Anthrax?
- what I thought was going to be a turtleneck turned out to be a dickey
- Why I didn't get my driver's license until I was 18
- What was I thinking when I said it didn't hurt?
- Finding the origin of a Hotmail message
- I Was the Girl You Were Told Not to Be
- Foam on the tide is no more or less real than the sea, it simply is, was, will be
- I didn't ask if the glass was half full or half empty. I've always had enough to drink.
- I didn't know such things when I was young
- When someone was willing to drown with me, I really didn't want to drown anymore
- Shaymus is older than I thought he was
- Which God was cooler, the one from the Old Testament or the one from the New Testament?
- She always was all tea and oranges that came all the way from China
- Fruit cut from the vine, forgot and left to rot, long before it was time
- collecting on old debts from when mom was a loan shark
- RIT was supposed to be built in New Mexico
- If this was an Olympic Sport, I'd be world champion
- In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
- All the while he was talking she was thinking what his whiskers would feel like on the back of her neck
- I tiptoe back into myself so I can run from what I was
- I was throwing around useless proverbs when all she needed was to be held and told that she was beautiful
- Wheresoever he went, there was Eden
- When he was little, he laughed in his sleep.
- Once there was a bug in a hole that he dug
- he was alive, and some of the other people, they were carbon copies
- Most adults forget what it was like to be a child once they hit a certain age
- When I was 21, he was building a Time Machine
- The Story of the Envious Man and of Him Who Was Envied
- the magic that was meant to capture the outlaw instead transformed him into a monster
- To a girl who thought she was moving away
- She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
- He was a man stuck between the objective and the subjective
- The mailbomb from the Christian Fundamentalists I pissed off should be here any day now
- He Was Only Joking
- He was hard in all the wrong places
- Before I was consciously thinking of him, my body was
- I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
- Last time I checked, Buddha was not just some lameass winamp skin for Jesus
- I was just a supporting character in your fairy tale
- The demon was just under three feet tall
- Just how perfect was Jesus?
- Sympathy for the Mongols & How The Rise of the West was just sheer Dumb Luck
- He didn't want to be Gary anymore
- it was just as if she held her breath for 82 years
- Just standing there, wearing my boxers, in my driveway. I was watching the stormfront. You were watching me.
- I was Dan for fifteen minutes and I never want to be Dan again
- I was Chris to him
- If God was willing to let it be
- I had to call my father this evening and tell him I was dying.
- The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
- She was too beautiful to be human
- His love was enormous; it cleared rooms that desperately wanted to be full.
- The total sum of all things would be zero if it was not for love
- If I was the ocean, what would you be to me?
- this was supposed to be a parable about the power of the imagination
- Could you be any more of a poseur? 'Changes' was a best-of!
- She was watching me and I didn’t know it.
- can it be that it was all so simple then
- My father's secret life was never meant to be secret
- It didn't matter what star it came from, just the familiar warmth of the sunlight on his face
- I didn't want to know where I was conceived
- It Was Cold, and It Ran Through Your Fingers
- It was something that sang out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
- I was not made for love songs, and love songs will never be made for me.
- She didn't know what outside was anymore.
- There once was a man from St. Paul
- The trail of its demise was visible from the surf.
- Your smile was embarrassed. Your fingers were dew-covered. I am still smiling.
- My finger can point to the moon, but my finger is not the moon. You don't have to become my finger, nor do you have to worship my finger. You have to forget my finger, and look at where it is pointing.
- "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
- I Was Kidnapped By Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
- I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
- It was late when he came home; it woke you up
- throw away words we catch in cages where our hearts should be
- My purity was little stickers I willingly gave away in exchange for hearts
- This book was stolen from the Harvard College Library. It was later recovered. The thief was sentenced to two years at hard labor.
- How I was thrown from a car at 45 mph
- If I were watched alone, I'd be considered insane
- He stretched out his arms but she was not there
- Tom, He was a Piper's Son
- The Abridged Edition: She was to one side, he was to the other, an untested bridge between them
- He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
- Then again, maybe he was recruiting for a cult
- More than he was willing to give
- It was 1992. He smiled.
- He was like the bottle of Champagne Krug
- Boy, I was sure lucky to be born into the one true faith!
- I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
- He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
- At least he was gentle
- He thinks a path and travels the emptiness that was there
- This was not my going away party
- How my Father was excommunicated from the LDS Church
- What's Hecuba to him, or he to Hecuba, that he should weep for her?
- If love was a circus, you'd be a clown
- he listened so well, he was still curious.
- The Trial: Andrew Johnson was not guilty of the crimes for which he was impeached.
- he was a punk poet himself
- She was coming out as he was going in.
- He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
- He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
- Her self image was not the force field she imagined it to be
- He was found
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