This love is not mine; it's something I give to you because you are the true
owner of it, like returning a long-lost possession back to its original bearer.
"Did you lose this? I found it and realized its value- has your name written
all over it. Here. Fairly precious, this thing called love." I wish
I could say that it's mine, though. It certainly feels nice and definitely makes
me happy to hold it in my hands, but I fear that if I hold it for too long,
this thing that belongs to you and you alone, it might cause me more damage
than if I simply handed it over to you.
So I offer you this love and you say the appropriate thing in response: Thank
you. It's a simple transaction, really.
But what does this mean, in the long-run? That's the terrifying
thing about saying "I love you" to someone: what will tomorrow
bring? Because, let's face it, sometimes we give things to the wrong people,
people that aren't meant to have such precious things as our hearts. Love is
a gamble, but giving it is betting on the big money, which can sometimes
be foolish in and of itself.
We are all gamblers with our hearts. Red or black, it doesn't matter,
when the Wheel of Time stops spinning, your chances of winning are still about
50/50. And, of course, only time will tell. I don't care how apt a cliché
is, sometimes a cliché can be as nasty and blindingly simple as a train
wreck. Blast wave and all, a cliché spells things out for those who
really understand them and for those of us who don't understand
them, well, love is a boon for the wicked and foolish, too. And to those who
experience it, love is never a cliché.
There should be easier, simpler, less confusing ways to say "I love you"
to someone. Words just don't carry the same weight as
the feeling behind them. Actions speak louder than words, for those who have
eyes to listen. Look around. Do the actions of someone who says they love you
actually carry the conviction of their words? I don't have much in this world
except my honor and my deeds; I try to use them wisely and not spend them
on the heedless, for the heedless are not the true, intended owners of love.
I give you my love. Please spend it wisely.