Eurolines is a company that offers budget travel for students, backpackers and East Europeans. Obviously any company involved in budget travel has to cut down on some of the more luxurious qualities of a transport service.

Eurolines has cut down on comfort, space, basic facilities, speed, and English speaking drivers. It is possible to improve some of this aspects if you follow my hard earned advice, gained after travelling on a 60 day Eurolines Pass.

1) Be the first to board the coach and choose the seat at the front - this will usually result in all other passengers passing you with the aim of searching for their own seat.
2) Take your shoes off - Your feet will swell!
3) Enhance your appearance to look dirty, smelly, lacking in any sense of hygiene and smelling of a cheese or garlic (or both) - Any sane person would not want to sit next to any such person the entire 72 hour journey from Dublin to St Petersburg, would you?
4) The moment you board the coach and find your seat instantly "fall" into a Rip Van Winkle type coma that involves you lying heavily on both of the seats using a vast pile of your bags as a pillow - Most people feel highly uncomfortable with waking a smelly, dirty person, and will look for anywhere else to sit.
5) Bring a walkman and enough music to survive the lenght of your nth hour ride.
6) Bring lots of food and drink.
7) Bring a Mr Bean or universally acceptable VHS tape, the driver will happily play it for you and the rest of the passengers on the coach's TV.
8) Play mindgames with your own concept of time - Your maxim for the trip is "Time Is Relative!!!!".
9) Go to toilet before boarding, on the ferry and at the stops. The chemical toilets can be rancid.

10) Go to sleep on the two seats you earned earlier* - Use sleeping pills, or get drunk during the ferry crossings.

*Some of the time your coach will be full, and you'll only have one seat. Tough luck!

I've never travelled with Greyhound, but I presume some of these points could be applied there.

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