Where to begin...Hmmm... Although I don't lavish the concept of revisiting this again, I feel that, hopefully, getting it out in the open that I will be able to let it go of it and stop dwelling on it.
(( Dream Sequence ))
I was at my PC, doing some sort of coding on some progect and exchanging messages with my GF on ICQ. Then I got a message from her that made no sense until I somehow realised that this message was not inteded for me, but for someone else on her contact list:
no, my boyfriend doesn't suspect a thing. he still thinks i've never kissed anyone but him. he's so stupid he believes me when i say i think about him when we make out.
...I felt so betrayed and so very enraged. The next thing I know, I'm standing in her room, tears streaming down my face as she laughs at me for being so stupid.. for thinking anyone would ever love me.
I woke up soon after that. I had clenched my fists so tight in my sleep, I cut my palms with my fingernails. Why do I have these dreams, anyway? I know she loves me. Why won't my psyche just let me be happy for once?