Early, before our hands knew what to do (place)
See all of Early, before our hands knew what to do
, there are 2 more in this node.
Sun Aug 06 2000 at 1:18:20
Here's how lucky I am:
back when we were young enough to call it
and not be kidding, I got to fool around in a barn. We were friends only because our mothers were friends, they taught English overseas together
a million unimaginable years ago
. Mom drove us, carful of whiners, across the state to Sharon's farm. It always took too long, getting there and being there, none of us wanted to go,
we knew how boring it would get
by the end of the weekend.
Kim and I were expected to play Barbies together because we were at the Barbie age together. Go Play Barbies, said our mothers who wanted to drink brandy in the kitchen and talk about our dads
in voices too low to eavesdrop
until one of them pealed out into laughter. My mom pounded the table sometimes; it embarrassed me
Barbie was going to get married I think, maybe just go to prom, whatever, preparations took so long to get her dressed and set the scene that we were
sick of it
and quit before the action started. Kim said Let's go look at the kittens so we did. The barn was dark even in afternoon, dusty shafts of light spearing in through knotholes. Silent. One lame horse chewing straw and eyeing us. Kim led the way to the base of the ladder which I would not admit to being scared of. I did not live in a world that expected me to go up rickety handmade ladders made of threatening rustnails pounded through uneven lengths of gray board. Kim didn't hesitate so neither could I.
At the top she showed me a nest of kittens but they were not kittens as I knew them, these were wild and yellow and
to do with us. The mother was full of hate and hissed us to the other side of the hayblocks. Kim had a blanket and wizard of oz books and warm cokes stashed up there, she said she liked it by the triangle window looking out over the cows. I imagined her freckled face getting closer and closer to the book until it got too dark.
Maybe the freckles were why I let her kiss me.
It wasn't a big deal of a kiss. Mostly we were talking and tickling and throwing hay over the edge and at each other and then she was kissing me a little bit, not even centered correctly, sort of on the edge of my lips and I held very still and my hand was on her arm, tough and muscley, from doing farm things I could only imagine. How many implements did she use every day, how many scythes and harness buckles did she know that I would only ever see in Americana museums, rusted?
It was probably
only that one kiss
but more important was lying in the hay together. One of us said Gee it's getting chilly up here and snuggled against the other one, it was a joke, we were awkward,
we were kids who wanted to touch each other but didn't know how to get away with it.
We were both in shorts and thin tshirts and the hay was hard and pokey, scratched us all over but it was important that we stay for a while, uncomfortable, next to each other, hands moving on each other just a little, just enough.
Raunch and OMG Sex!
I like it!
If this were in person, I would have kissed her now
The Knack... and How to Get It
Silly things we believe when we're kids
How long do you think I'll let you keep me here?
I know there are other fish in the sea but I don't want them
my brilliant career, chapter 117
How to lie and get away with it
How to get in touch with your feminine side
What I learned from fingertips under the table
Life in the absence of a writer
These are the memories I never had
Almost broke the rules
What do guys think of girls who hook up with pseudo-random guys?
A Thousand Leaves
Wordmongers' Masque: Poets' Ball
Second grade treehouse kisses
What We Found in the Sofa and How it Saved the World
I am prepared to be just as mysterious as you
How Not to be Wrong
Spy v. Spy: The German government's attempt to ban the National Democratic Party
Women, Espionage, and the Civil War
You cannot burn the a eastern
A Pandeist responds to Chris Evans' "My thoughts on Pandeism"
girlie response to Fight Club
my cat's thyroid issues
Cut me some slack
She Bit Him In Two
We perceive time as linear, as an ant at the center of a basketball court perceives the world as flat
you can't feel nothing small
now, when it's nearly impossible to get lost and twice as impossible not to be found
Everything2 ™ is brought to you by Everything2 Media, LLC. All content copyright © original author unless stated otherwise.