How to fall out of an airplane (idea)
See all of How to fall out of an airplane
, there is 1 more in this node.
Thu Mar 16 2000 at 6:03:27
. If you fall from a low enough height, and haven't died of
, now is the time to start thinking about
. You may be able to
Check your altitude
. This is actually a trick question. If you are wearing an
, then chances are you don't need to read this. Check your back for a
. If there is a parachute, your prognosis is good. Please see
Survey landing locations.
No parachute, eh? Bummer. Okay, now look down and take a good look at the ground. This may be
-- DON'T PANIC. If there are any
bodies of water
below, you want to steer clear of them. Water is the worst thing to hit. Look especially for
-- the best way to land is by rolling down a hill. Large inflated crash mats are great, too, but chances are you won't find any handy.
This should be pretty intuitive. Use
to maneuver yourself over your chosen landing location. If you need help, see
. You should be able to cover considerable ground in the air.
Preparing to land.
Okay, the big moment is coming up. This may sound weird, but the best thing to do is to
. Most survivors of this kind of fall are
children, who haven't got the same muscle tension adults do. Prepare to go completely
when you hit the ground. Assuming you found a hill, prepare to roll. Devise a landing posture and angle such that no major leg bones will be driven up into your torso.
It's going to
. I'm not going to kid you. You'll need an
pretty soon after you land. But after a few weeks in intensive care,
just think of the story you will be able to tell
. And if you focus on positives like this, you are more likely to live to thank yourself.
I like it!
how to survive an armed robbery
How to jump into water from a height
Today I looked Death in the eyes and smiled
chuteless high-altitude free fall
How Airborne School nearly killed me
How can a thinking, rational adult be a monotheist?
Chewing on ice
What not to do in a car crash
Safety Study: Emergency Evacuation of Commercial Airplanes
How far can an animal fall and survive?
How to survive an aircraft mishap
How to write an episode of Dukes of Hazzard
Time flies but aeroplanes crash
3 point landing
Don't kill yourself until you've completed the checklist
General advice for preventing attacks
Body hair on women
burning the midnight oil
Debbie Does Dallas
The donuts are so pretty
December 2, 2016
At the Goose Farm
My body is a battlefield, and all my breasts ever do is argue about existentialism
Dying of cancer
In a certain faraway land
Son of Zorn
Webb's Depths of Knowledge
An Incomplete List of Untrue Facts
Everything2 ™ is brought to you by Everything2 Media, LLC. All content copyright © original author unless stated otherwise.