How to fall out of an airplane (idea)
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Thu Mar 16 2000 at 6:03:27
. If you fall from a low enough height, and haven't died of
, now is the time to start thinking about
. You may be able to
Check your altitude
. This is actually a trick question. If you are wearing an
, then chances are you don't need to read this. Check your back for a
. If there is a parachute, your prognosis is good. Please see
Survey landing locations.
No parachute, eh? Bummer. Okay, now look down and take a good look at the ground. This may be
-- DON'T PANIC. If there are any
bodies of water
below, you want to steer clear of them. Water is the worst thing to hit. Look especially for
-- the best way to land is by rolling down a hill. Large inflated crash mats are great, too, but chances are you won't find any handy.
This should be pretty intuitive. Use
to maneuver yourself over your chosen landing location. If you need help, see
. You should be able to cover considerable ground in the air.
Preparing to land.
Okay, the big moment is coming up. This may sound weird, but the best thing to do is to
. Most survivors of this kind of fall are
children, who haven't got the same muscle tension adults do. Prepare to go completely
when you hit the ground. Assuming you found a hill, prepare to roll. Devise a landing posture and angle such that no major leg bones will be driven up into your torso.
It's going to
. I'm not going to kid you. You'll need an
pretty soon after you land. But after a few weeks in intensive care,
just think of the story you will be able to tell
. And if you focus on positives like this, you are more likely to live to thank yourself.
I like it!
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