She was my
best friend. She was my
first real
friend. She's still one of the
best friends i have even though she's
450 miles away. She was the first person to really talk to me, to give me a chance when no one else would, to actually listen to
some psycho, antisocial nature boy in high school. She hung out with me, talked on the
phone for hours, told me about good bands, introduced me to most of my other
friends, chose
clothes for me,
bleached my hair, basically allowed me to climb out of the pit i was in. She went to my
prom with me. She was there for me the first time i fell in love and got crushed, never expecting anything or being pushy, or complaining that i whined about other girls. She was there when i went away to
college, and still there to get
drunk with and talk to for hours when i came back. She was there for me the second time i
fell in love and got
crushed, and listened. The third time i got it right, and she didn't get jealous or complain. She's just always there. And she's a
lesbian.
I can't lie - when she first told me this i was a little upset. Not because i had anything against lesbians but becuase she hadn't told me for so long. Sure, there were rumors, but rumors are rumors and I ignored them. I guess we had told each other so much, it seemed silly to leave out something big. But i guess she didnt admit it to herself, either. It was quite a shock at the time. Admittedly, although i never really disliked homosexuals, i considered them as a strange, alien thing, something i'd joke about with my friends and not really think about. This sure as hell changed my perspective. But really, it didnt change anything in our friendship, except that it improved. It's the best thing in the world to be able to hang out with someone who is a girl, who is caring and cool and has the point of view of a girl, but not to have to worry about it getting 'weird' or complicated. She was a girl, and my friend. But i didn't have to worry about anything else, because she doesnt go for boys.
I am lucky that i never ended up falling for her as i tend to for many of my friends. It's not that she isnt cute; she is. She's certainly cool enough too. But it was just never like that. She is one of the rare examples of people of the opposite sex actually considering each other like brother and sister (usually people who claim this want to either jump down each other's pants, or blow someone off). We go to the beach and check out the girls, go wander around, get drunk, drive around up on the dirt roads above LA. And it's all cool. And she's a lesbian, and i think that's awesome.