A formational period of anticipation. From a pregnant woman comes, hopefully, a baby. From a pregnant pause in conversation comes, hopefully, a piece of brilliant wit spoken out loud. From a pregnant conflict comes, inevitably, much nastiness.

One couple I know gets pregnant, and then he marries her and they have another kid. Another couple were only roommates when she got pregnant. They got married and then had another kid. I know of two more married couples who had not been married much over a year that got pregnant. One was met with joy and the other was met with frustration and denial. The latter ended up having yet another kid. At the time when the mothers got pregnant, not one of them was over 23. To be honest. I would say almost all of them wish they hadn't gotten pregnant at all.

I'm insensitive, and I don't know anything. Maybe it's a matter of having good odds. I slept around quite a bit in my past, and I wasn't necessarily as safe as I should have been (I did always use a condom), yet I've never gotten pregnant. Some excuses for the above pregnancies had to do with not having any condoms, or not being able to afford birth control that month, and I'm sorry, that's not a good enough excuse.

I know that chance for pregnancy increases with every child, that birth control is not as predictable or reliable. I know that pregnancy does not destroy relationships or is any way, in itself, a bad thing. But when people who aren't married get married because of a pregnancy, or in some rare cases people who aren't even dating do so, I get concerned. Most people, including myself, would say, "I would prefer that not happen to me." Few people actually want an untimely pregnancy, even though some women have been accused of getting pregnant on purpose.

I don't think it's much to ask that I be married already and have spent a good amount of years with that person before I get pregnant, but in view of the order of how such things occur, I'm beginning to think that my desires are becoming less and less common. I think part of that is due to how easy it appears to terminate the responsibility of a pregnancy with either abortion, adoption, or preventative abortion, like RU-486 (as it becomes more accessible to those who need it). It seems that not only are people not being responsible, but they also succumb to the statistics that declare just how common pregnancy has become in our society, how disposable it seems.

Thankfully, in most cases, even when the pregnancy is unexpected, the nuturing instinct kicks in and helps out. Maybe I will be more sensitive or sympathetic when I get pregnant. Until then, I will try my hardest not to be until I am ready.

I was 4 months pregnant when I got married. I was also 21 years old. I guess I fall into the previously mentioned catagory of getting married for the child.

I didn't intend to get pregnant, but I wasn't doing anything to prevent it. I'm one of the ridiculously low 2% of the female population who does not respond well to the hormones in birth control pills. I absolutely abhor condoms. The pull out method was our 'birth control.' It obviously didn't work.

We were engaged and living together and had a date set for our wedding. We had even started planning the wedding. It was going to be on Halloween and we were going to be in costume. Then things really changed.

I wasn't sure how he would react, but thankfully, he was overjoyed. Now I just had to tell our parents. Here I was, a 21 year old woman and so scared to tell my parents that I was pregnant. What were they going to do, ground me??? My dad's reaction was 'I hoped that one of my daughter's didn't HAVE to get married'. I was angry. I certainly didn't HAVE to get married, I WANTED to get married!

We chose to get married before I gave birth to reduce the confusion regarding last names. I wasn't showing in my wedding pictures and I wasn't sick, either.

Of course, I wish I had done things differently. I've been in several beautiful weddings and am always inwardly jealous that I didn't have that. I'll have to live with that. Even still, I will never regret having my daughter. She is my heart and my soul and her father is my best friend. We plan to have a large ceremony to renew our vows on a major anniversary, such as our 10th. My life is wonderful and I currently expecting our second child. Things couldn't be better.

You know, being old enough, happily married, and actually intending to have gotten pregnant can really make you feel like an outcast nowadays.

People I don't know ask me, "Should I congratulate you?", with a look on their faces that says they're ready not to, or to do so dubiously.

Friends tell me, "You're the first person I know to have a kid that I can celebrate about!" I'm the first person I know, too.

Both his sister and my brother have a child of varying illegitimacy. Our parents nearly wept with relief to hear about us. Not good for sibling relations.

*****

So somehow, all the people who screwed it up are managing to make pregnancy a lot less fun for the rest of us, too. I either feel constantly sorry for other parents (more so, their kids) or like I'm being stuck up because I managed to use a condom.

Preg"nant (?), a. [L. praegnans, -antis; prae before + genere, gignere, to beget: cf. F. pr'egnant. See Gender, 2d Kin.]

1.

Being with young, as a female; having conceived; great with young; breeding; teeming; gravid; preparing to bring forth.

2.

Heavy with important contents, significance, or issue; full of consequence or results; weighty; as, pregnant replies.

" A pregnant argument." Prynne. " A pregnant brevity."<-- pregnant silence -->

E. Everett.

3.

Full of promise; abounding in ability, resources, etc.; as, a pregnant youth.

[Obs.]

Evelyn.

Wherein the pregnant enemy does much. Shak.

Pregnant construction Rhet., one in which more is implied than is said; as, the beasts trembled forth from their dens, that is, came forth trembling with fright.

 

© Webster 1913.


Preg"nant, n.

A pregnant woman.

[R.]

Dunglison.

 

© Webster 1913.


Preg"nant, a. [F. prenant taking. Cf. Pregnable.]

Affording entrance; receptive; yielding; willing; open; prompt.

[Obs.] " Pregnant to good pity."

Shak.

 

© Webster 1913.

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