After seeing some really dumb things recently that I won't go into, I've decided to insult some idiots
while simultaneously writing a useful and helpful node
. This deals primarily with meeting people like attractive actresses
, since that seems to be what most people think about when they hear "meeting celebrities," but it can scale to anything else with minor modifications.
Suffice to say that I had the unfortunate opportunity to see person after person after person violate one or more of these fairly common sense things when dealing with someone last night. It didn't get them anywhere, and annoyed the living shit out of the celebrity they were doing it to. This isn't the first time I've seen this kind of thing happen either.
1. Don't drool all over them. She's attractive. She knows it too. Down, boy.
2. Don't revere them like you're meeting a goddess. Why? Because everyone else does that too. It's annoying as all hell. They like it, but wouldn't you like being treated like a human being?
3. Don't walk into it with this stupid complex that you suck and she's some kind of Goddess. People are very good at picking up pathetic self-esteem.If you do this and he/she avoids you, don't get pushier. Pushier = dumber.
4. Don't set up shrines, show newspaper clippings, etc. This isn't some kind of bizarre B-grade horror flick.
5. If you must make an impression, try not to make yourself look like a raving psychopath.
6. Reiteration: For God's sake, treat the person like a human being, not some object or status symbol.
This isn't that hard, folks.
See also comments to this effect in: Why not lust over women one might realistically have a chance with?