Yeah, throwing stars. I guess they found a place online that sells traditional eastern weaponry for cheap, and so the first thing they do when the first paycheck comes through is to buy a 12-pack of shuriken. I can't think of a single reason why, except maybe to deal with all the ninjas.

I hear that ninja infestation is becoming quite a problem these days. Sure, I've had pretty extensive training in the martial arts, so they don't bother me much. You know, once in a while you'll find one dangling from the ceiling by his grappling hook or a dead one in the toilet, but it's never anything major. I guess my roommates just lack the training to deal with them properly. They called the landlord, but he's no help. They send somebody to spray once a month, but that guy obviously doesn't know what he's doing. Everybody knows that if you see one, there's probably hundreds lurking just out of sight. Hence the throwing stars, I guess.

Now that I think about it, there's really nothing more embarassing than bringing a girl home and trying to set a romantic mood only to have her wrinkle her nose and say, "Oh... you've got ninjas..." Maybe I'll just have to order me a set of those throwing stars, too.

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