Well I thought this was all over and done with. She dumped me, months ago. Gone from my life, and me from hers. It seems, however, that new things just keep on turning up. This is all so childish, so pathetic, but it still hurts when I find out what she up to behind my back, while I couldn't see past the big smile up front.
I found an e-mail, not to me but I needn't go into the details of how I aquired it. It seems she and her friends composed a brief opera regarding how should would dump me. Thinking back, the actual event was worrying similar, in an artistic sense, to the contents. I'm posting it here because I want to get it out of my system, and also because some of it is amusingly pathetic and sycophantic. I don't expect sympathy votes. In fact, given my record on daylogs, I expect brutal down voting. I've left it warts and all, except to add a few links here and there, and names have been changed to protect the innocent. She will know be known as Lucy. Loo is still me. Right then:
Are you stuck in a relationship that you don’t know how to get out of? Is you’re partner driving you insane? Well here is a novel idea....dump them....in a musical. Produced for Lucy by Sarah, Alice and Linda, with special help from others. Thank you guys. You’re so supportive.
Setting: A suburban street
Lucy: I, we, have something to tell you.....
Loo: U do? What is it?
<All pop up from behind hedgerows, walls etc>
All of us together yes we’re
<skate 2 middle of street on rollar blades, join in line formation>
Lucy doesn’t want you any more,
You’re such a bore,
<all spin round>
We’re dumping you...
Don’t need you bay-bee
U’ve bin around 2 long
U’re far 2 lazy
That’s y we wrote this song
Don’t need u bay-bee
Trust in us wen we siing
<Catch hats and canes thrown out by people from upstairs windows who then join in>
Don’t bother bay-bee
I just don’t need you, Loo
Let’s make this speedy
Coz i’ve got stuff to do
You’re just not worth it
-u won’t even come 2
prom, u tit.....
<tap dance interlude and then a breakbeat>
boom chh, dumping u, boom chh, dumping you, boom chh etc
Yo listen up, i’ve got something 2 say
we’re bin going out 4 a year and a day
I hate ure flirtiness and ure friendship with Chester
between you and me she’s a ponytailed Fester
don’t bother- ain’t nothing u can do
i’m a superstar rapper and I’m dumpin u
<elephants and trapeze artists appear. Fireworks, Chinese dragons, people in cakes, dancing penguins>
<music returns. waltzing couples. all join in final verse>
and so, u c, it’s truee- we’re thruuu
WE’RE DUMPING YOUUUUU
<Irish jig madly to fade>
Stunned Loo. Lucy returns breathless from jigging.
Loo: sarcastic anything else I should know?
Lucy: thinks erm...
Dancers and Lucy: There’s someone else!!!!
<Dancers who were walking away, turn round, all wearing “we love X T-shirts and begin to sway.>
He’s just 2 good 2b trueee
Way superior 2 uuuuu
He feels like heaven to touch
and I wanna hold him so much
at long last love has arrived
and I thank god I’m alive
he’s just 2 good 2b truee
and that’s y I’m now dumping u- fade
<dancers encircle Lucy, lift her up as music swells at key change>
Lucy: I close my eyes,
<Lucy lowered to ground, begins to stalk sexily 2wards Loo in stilettos and thigh split dress>
so I can’t see u
Dancers: <with wagging finger movement> aaa-aaa-aaa
Lucy: cos u look like poo
Lucy: That’s y we’re dumping youu
Dancers: da-da-da-dumping youuu....
<smoke billows, engulfs dancers who fade 2 background, Lucy stands, statuesque, smiling sweetly, banner of "someone else" unfurled behind her, smoke clears, reveals dancers an AMAZING ruffly can-can outfits/tuxes, in freeze. Dancers part girl-boy, kiss on cheeks>
Crazy Can-can music begins Moulin Rouge Stylee. Everyone dances like there’s no 2moro, cue firework display; glitter, fire etc. Every1 groups 2getha in pyramids, Lucy lifted high, enthroned by human chain of tuxedo-ed males, smiling broadly, shakey outstretched hand movements......
All: DUMPING YOU!!!!
Hold freeze, music ends, fin.
Incidentally, her relationship with the "someone else" mentioned lasted one week, after he released he was being used. Perceptive guy.