Jason X (2002) - Weasello Rating: {>>>>} (WOohooOo) {{ Prequel }}
Please note that this review is laden with spoilers.

Unfortunately, I couldn't see my notepad in the theatre and I couldn't take notes. I will double the details once I get it on video.

Jason Injury Count: I do know he was shot even more than he was in the previous movie; I'd say around 2,000 rounds were pumped into his body at the bare minimum. Keep in mind that most of the bullets are from weapons constructed in the year 2455, including some rounds that resulted in T-1000-vs-grenade-launcher-like injuries. Other than gunfire, he sustained no major injuries. He was killed by re-entering the atmosphere of a planet and burning down to his hockey mask. Which promptly fell into a lake, fit for a sequel.

Body count: 21 (May be off by one or two), one was a Jason-fear-induced-suicide as opposed to a direct Jason mauling.

Plot Outline: This is the most entertaining movie of the entire 10 part series. Jason no longer goes to hell in this movie, but starts right out as being captured by the Crystal Lake Research Facility. He is cryogenically frozen until 2455, where a scavenger team unlocks him and brings him aboard their spaceship. This time, he isn't a supernatural hellspawn - now he has an amazing DNA structure that makes him regenerate lost flesh. Jason awakes and systematically kills half the crew before being upgraded by nanobots!

The nanobots give jason a highly chrome-polished look and a chrome futuristic hockey mask, and increase his height by about 2 feet. He then proceeds to knock doors and walls over with one hand, slaughtering more and more people.

There were some hilarious scenes, such as Jason beating some young girls with each other multiple times and (attempting to) kill people in virtual reality.

This movie achieves a new level of cheese, complete with past-movie references and predictable lines. A highly recommended movie, to be sure.

Interesting Notes:
  • There was an awesome moment in the movie where Jason traded his futuristic medical sawbone for his trusty 500-year-old machete.
Fun Quotes!
  • "How does he function with such a small brain?"
  • "Guys! It's OK! He just wanted his machete back!" (Thanks, isogolem)
Lead roles: Directed by: James Isaac

Writing credits: Todd Farmer, Characters: Victor Miller (II).

Tagline: Evil gets an upgrade!
Sources: The oh-so-wonderful IMDB, my head, and the box.

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