Ok, I am still pondering the moving. NeXT.boy is such a pimp (he told me to type that).. San Francisco, or Chicago.. follow my best friend.. or brave being 100% alone. BTW, guys confuse the hell out of me. On my trip to Chicago (im still here).. I have had my pseudo-boyfriend, who doesn't get any play (NeXT.boy).. this hottie guy, who called me a little girl in a condecending way, and then i met my dream guy who i wont ever have, who probably isn't my dream guy.. but he is at least 4 inches under teh surface.. but i can't even attempt to have him because it is impossible. I have a really fucked up world btw. I created it, but its fucking odd.

breakfast: 1.5 litres of egg nog.

lunch: ice cream from the casa gelato: mandarin orange sorbetto, toblerone and P.C.M. (pineapple-coconut-macadamia.)

dinner: three slices of pizza: feta and spinach (*****), potato (***), spicy chicken (****).

dessert: a whole container of glosette's raisins, 90% of a jumbo bag of cherry Twizzlers.

Bank business taken care of, Loothi met, Live Flesh screened, old friends thought of.

Next: registration and shoes.

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in our last episode... | p_i-logs | and then, all of a sudden...

Still sick. Woke up at 7, had some Rice Krispies, tried to sleep and failed. Read three chapters of Linux Kernel Internals. Read the NYT book review. Finally slept for three hours. Watched The Matrix on DVD. Had dinner with Y and talked about work. Wrote my Alexander Hamilton write-up. Blew my nose 3,000 times and took some Tylenol (throughout the day). Went to work. I, too, have since devoured about 90% of a jumbo bag of Twizzlers.

Alone, at peace, the first time in weeks. Irritable, restless, scattered, it should have occured to me why. Social interaction makes me tense, uneasy, nervous. Small doses are fine, a steady stream grates badly. The only alone time has been slumberland, simply not enough. Vacation for all the kids coming to an end feels good and bad. Companionship will be missed, but tranquility welcomed. On the phone, a friend from out of town, checking to make sure I was alright sans legal trouble. After hanging up a conclusion dropped in my lap. I want a girlfriend that is street-smart.

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