An insult I hurled at my phys ed coach when I was in fourth grade. Note that I didn't actually call him an ass. I only said there was an isomorphism through photocopying between him and an ass.

I put that man through the wringer. He didn't realize that if I was refusing to run ten laps around the basketball court, ordering me to run another ten laps wouldn't work. I refused to run 20 laps -- then 30, then 40, and eventually I was refusing to run over 100 laps. I would have refused to run a marathon if he'd thought to order me to do so.

In truth, we were both stubborn asses. Who's the more foolish, the fool, or the fool who follows him? But I was happy to hear recently that the old goat still gets a belly laugh out of my insult -- he tells it as a war story about That Weird Kid Who Didn't Want To Run Laps.

Go figure. I just didn't see the point in running. Call me the Anti-Forrest, but that guy was sadistic. Lucky for me he was also not too bright.