• Why do people only think I'm hot when I'm not available?
• You're only half a bitch without the heels
• When I'm out of sorts I look at the calender. There's usually something good on the horizon.
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• finding my way back to sanity again, though I don't really know what I'm going to do when I get there
• It's memories that I'm stealing, but you're innocent when you dream
• There is Nowhere Left to Go When You're The Handsomest Man in the World
• When true love dies, there are no paparazzi
• Risqué comment opportunities when you're a Subway employee
• You're A Woman, I'm a Machine
• You're voting this sucka down now, but I'm going to laugh
• Why is rape wrong only when a man commits it?
• I only dance when my feet are on fire
• certain wisdoms about a place can only come from dying there
• A lie only hurts when it's told by people you care about
• There are times when they seem to be right
• This is the place you see in your head when you're sitting at your desk dreaming
• You know you're blacked out when...
• I only smoke when I drink
• How to buy LEGO sets when you're over twice the suggested age
• You wake up slowly when you're a mile underground
• If only the spaghetti westerns were half as good as their titles
• I know more when I'm alone
• I'm reading this like you're chewing with your mouth full
• You're Gone Now. And I'm (Not) Sorry.
• only when you cannot hear
• #9ZZZZ: There is only badger
• Is there a kind of information you're better off not having?
• How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All?
• When you're a quarterback, you should not screw with the minds of your linemen
• It's only love: at the end of the day, there are still thunderstorms and sunsets
• Mixed drinks you come up with when you're drunk
• I miss you when you're away. Please go.
• When I'm swept up by the Rapture, grab the wheel of my pick-up
• There were only twelve raindrops, she counted them on the windshield under heavy soft skies
• There is only now
• when you're 30, you'll change your mind
• You know you're in a terrible mood when the songs don't work
• Don't touch me when I'm on a boat
• Stay there. I'm going to get my gun.
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• Were you really expecting to only learn true things when you signed up for this class?
• There are no rules in language, only regularities
• there are only so many truths. everything else is derived
• Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead
• The hole in the ground for bodily waste when camping
• You can't rant when you're not angry
• You know you're in the SCA when
• Every Day's a Holiday When You're Pagan: February
• When you're the oldest, you're not allowed to feel pain
• You're laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka down
• When you're born with duckweed in your hair, it never washes out
• i only knew when silence screamed
• unknowing actors in an earthquake movie where there is only an earthquake inside of one person.
• Time flies when you're having fun
• Don't stop. You can sleep when you're dead.
• It's hard to get C!-ed when you're a boring programmer
• Why it seems you get good ideas when you're stoned
• Swing when you're winning
• I'm training my little half brother to take over the world
• When You're Evil
• Don't touch me when I'm screaming
• I wear this skirt only when the rodeo is in town
• Sing when you're winning
• Getting there is half the fun
• I'm rubber, you're glue
• Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry
• It only hurts when I breathe
• The good guys and the bad guys were on the back of the boat and I swear I only turned my back for a MINUTE but when I came back, they'd killed Mozart.
• When the suicide arrived at the sky, the people there asked him: "Why?"
• You know you're a geek when...
• When you're finished struggling... are you free tonight?
• Nobody Knows You when You're Down and Out
• When I'm Sixty-Four
• there's a trick with a knife I'm learning to do
• Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
• Were You There When They Crucified My Lord?
• You're there. Everywhere.
• Only at Chuck E. Cheese's, in the small hours with a gun in my hand, do I feel truly alive
• What To Expect When You're Expecting
• When, if ever, will there be permanent peace in the Balkans?
• Feeling like you're moving when you're really sitting still
• How to draw a 4-dimensional object, when you're limited to 3 dimensions
• i enjoy myself most when i'm all alone
• speak only when spoken to
• If you only smoke when you drink, you probably shouldn't drink kiroro
• Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans
• If there's a will, I hope I'm in it
• Point-Counterpoint: Just because I'm gay and you're a guy doesn't mean I want you
• I'm Going to Go Back There Someday
• IN THE GRIM FUTURE OF HELLO KITTY, THERE IS ONLY WAR.
• There is no suck, only blow
• We only smoke when bored so we do two packs a day, and we've lost the difference between bored and lonely anyway
• click this idiots, even though I'm telling you that there is no node with this title
• "A gentleman and a scholar" is only half right
• Stop saying "religion" when you mean "a particular religion about which I'm bitter"
• How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
• I'm Only Sleeping
• When I'm wearing a bonnet and sipping pretend tea with Miss Ponykins and Zippy the Ugly Zebra, that's when I feel the most like a man
• you're the only one who doesn't know
• Every Day's a Holiday When You're Pagan: January
• What do I do when I'm alone?
• I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
• You're Only Old Once!
• How do cows get all their nutrients, when they only eat grass?
• There was a time when I was a better person
• Only When I Lose Myself
• There is only one emotion with a built in safety feature
• I like it when I dream of her. It's the only time we get to talk.
• because I am only half of what you need
• Women want me when I'm taken
• When I'm long dead, the bee will win
• What is honesty when you're wearing a mask?
• I like the way I'm doing it better than the way you're not
• There Goes the Neighborhood! 3: im in ur house eating ur f00dz
• I'm Not There
• replace "Excited" with its sullen, long-term counterpart and I'm right there with you!
• I'm glad you're here.
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• The quality of relationships with people when you're sick
• Where do you hide when the dark is alive?
• I'm talking about the kind of love that keeps you alive.
• Southern Funerary Rites: Things to Do In Dixie When You're Dead
• I'm OK, you're not OK
• When there's nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire
• When you're home alone
• I'll explain it when you're older
• Live so that they cry when you're born and laugh when you die
• You're pretty when you're quiet
• When I sneeze, I get cross, and when I get cross I'm liable to do something wicked.
• There is only one season in Houston
• There is no data, only XUL.
• Everything looks beautiful when you're young and pretty
• when you're ready to touch me again
• it's hard to hear when you're stuck inside someone's torso
• We journal only when we hurt
• When faced with an army of sheep, your only choice is to run
• There is no terrorism. There is only war.
• There are only 86,000 eligible men in Australia
• there are no paradoxes, only false assumptions
• Spiral, spin, ride the whirlwind, knowing when the drumming stops, there will be no second dance
• It's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl.
• Sex starts when you're standing up
• So I'm wrestling with the demoness while the priest is trying not to soil his vestments, and Faust is just sitting there like an idiot
• I'll get there when I get there
• How to close a KFC when you're a cook
• Time stands still when you're in the tube
• There are only these moments strong and fiery. The rest is love and your imminent departure.
• If you don't know where you're going, any path will take you there
• When you're supposed to go down, find the deepest well and go down to the bottom
• Music You Listen to When You're Depressed
• I'm ok, you're ok, that's ok, ok?
• You're not laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka up
• there are some things that can only be said at the top of a ferris wheel
• Revolving doors that only open when someone exits
• When you're alone
• How to open a KFC when you're a cook
• When the aliens attack my workplace, I'm going to be so damn READY
• I always sound Irish when I'm trying to be charming
• When I stop going there, I will be well.
• Things to do on Valentine's day when you're single
• When you're dead, you're dead
• Knowing you're going to die when you turn 30
• you're not alive until you have nothing left to lose
• you can only make me dizzy if you're spinning me in leaves or snowflakes
• There are words. When new ideas confront us, we create new words. We forget that there are no words.
• When you're little, mom and dad are superheroes
• You're not alive until you have something to lose
• I walk around when I'm high
• There is only one electron
• There are a couple of people in a cafe with only glass between them. And something important is happening
• I can only pray that, when I finally leave, I will have done little enough damage to be totally forgotten
• You're never around when I need you
• The body's alive, but no head. I'm having a lot of trouble accepting it.
• Things to do in Denver when you're not dead: A Mile-High Nodermeet
• I'm OK, You're OK
• I'm always breathless when you call
• There is only ONE God
• When you pirate MP3s, you're downloading communism
• When I look into her eyes, I no longer care about what the world thinks. This is what it feels like to be alive.
• It's hard to be an addict when you're broke
• Where I'm From, You'd Think There Was a Tea Party Going On in the Hostess Dumpster
• There can be only one
• Corporations only feel hits to their wallet
• OCD is the only way to animate
• Peter Pan and the Only Children
• Outside the train station she was the only person wearing an Orange raincoat and a look of surprise
• death is only the beginning

If you Log in you could create a "I'm only half alive when you're not there" node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.