In today’s automated world of
self-opening doors and
self-flushing urinals, the "
Out of Order" sign is a common sight.
All technology eventually fails and society has come to accept it. This can be
used to your advantage simply by strategically placing your own "
Out of Order" signs. Print up a couple
at work today and carry them with you, just in case. Here’s a couple of ideas, from my own personal experience, to get you started:
The Commuter Train
This was my first experience with utilizing my own
OoO sign. The
commuter train I take to work each day is packed and getting off at the end of the line can take a few minutes as a hundred people try to exit through 2 doors, one at each end of the
coach.
So I placed an
OoO sign on one of the doors. Since the doors slide into the wall of the train when they open,
passengers boarding the train don’t see the sign. As the train approaches the
station, people approaching the door see the sign and walk down to the other door.
By the time we've stopped, everyone is crowding the other door
while I wait by myself at the
OoO door. Result: I’m the first one off the train and I’ve avoided standing
shoulder-to-shoulder in
a crowd of commuters of dubious personal hygiene.
The Office Restroom
The bathroom at the office where I work contains 3
stalls. Two are the regular size, and one is the
handicap, or how I like to think of it:
"the wide, spacious, comfort stall". Of course every guy in the office goes for
the comfort stall as well; until I hang an
OoO sign on the door. Now not only is the stall free whenever I enter the restroom, I can also be (slightly more) sure that it is
relatively clean when I get there. Of course
maintenance pulls the sign off at night, but I’ve got a supply ready to replace them.
The Vending Machine
Our vending machine at work is always running out of
Coke, leaving me to choose between 3 types of diet whatever and
Five Alive. A small
OoO sign on the Coke button and viola! The Coke remains stocked until the guy comes to pickup the money and takes the sign off.
Note: The life span and volume of people fooled by the above signs can be greatly increased if your
OoO sign is printed on some
official (or at least
official looking) letterhead paper.
Variations
The "
Out of Order" sign concept, if not the words, can be utilized for a number of other purposes. For example, a "
Broken. Do not use." sign taped to
the good chair in the meeting room will not only assure you a seat at the next meeting but you get the good chair too.
Clean freaks and
OCD suffers may benefit from putting a "
Use Other Door" sign on one of the two doors leading into your office/apartment/etc. The majority of people will use
the other door and you’ve just decreased the likelihood of contracting some
disease (or whatever it is that makes you
twitchy about) spread by
door handles.
Reserve your parking spot for tomorrow by hanging "
Reserved for (insert any name here)" on the wall at the end of your spot.
Of course there are also a number of
OoO variation signs that are just plain
amusing:
- "Door sticks. Pull hard." on a door that that pushes to open.
- "Washroom out of order. Please use mens/womens." on each restroom door at your office/department store/etc. Sure some will just ignore the sign, but just as surely some will not.
- "Push button to open door". Hang this one over top of the sign designating the "Emergency" button near the door in the underground parking lot.
There are plenty of uses for "
Out of Order" signs and many more for its
variations. Try placing a couple of your own and you too will quickly realize
the value of a bit of unjustifiable, anonymous misdirection.