We don't know ourselves anymore

About middle of last summer, I realized I no longer knew myself. I woke up in Rome, having stayed awake for two straight days; I saw a stranger in the mirror. This was it, insanity. After all, how can one be sane if there is no bond between the mental and physical? My inside had become piq, who I had strived to become for years - but my shell had been left behind. This lasted for a month, the scariest month I have ever gone through.


while(true) fork();

Things move too fast for full processing, we perceive tidbits (like blades of grass outside the train window) and reconstruct our reality from them. There is no time for introspection: gotta go to class, gotta be at work, late, seven days a week, eighteen hours a day, coffee is the oil of our society. Life is no longer an experience, it's a process. We still die at the end, naked and alone.


nothing is beautiful

Pause for beauty