I wrote Death Protocol and I stand by it although it's got a negative rep (last time I checked anyway). It hurts me that someone who can help would bail on us. Before you go, avoid the mistake of ignorance. Think about it a while. Get a second opinion. Being wrong is okay.

I had a dream that I was on the train that takes me to work in Irvine. I realized I was dreaming and so I took some liberties. I started at one end of the train and I kissed each passenger, either on the lips or the forehead, depending on their sex, and I said "I love you." There is something in me that wants to love everyone. I woke up too soon.

I drive up to Irvine on Monday and back to San Diego on Friday. On my drive up this morning, I saw a few pretty women driving in a lane next to me. Then I remembered my dream, and everyone else on the freeway suddenly became... attractive, sort of - people I cared about. There was a man, light brown skin, clean shaven, driving with a relaxed face, but not looking happy. I wondered if he was listening to the news about the violence. I wrote a week or so ago that I could handle the frustration of my powerlessness against the supidity and damage being done to my world because I can be patient and expect lessons to be learned. This is not a claim with which I will part.

I read a lot of distressing stuff in this daylog. I wanted to remind you all that you've been happy. If you want to do that again, just pay attention to your life. You will find the spots that make it beautiful. I ask my daughter what makes her happy when we're driving home in the dark from Grandma's house, an 80 mile trip, which she always begins with complaints, fear, cries of desperation, screaming that we never should have gone to visit grandma in the first place. She can't answer me. She's five. You're older than that, and you probably can answer the question. Answer it for yourself, and watch out for more happiness to come.

I could fix the world in a few years if only I were smart enough. Teach me.