I was gonna call this little ditty something along the lines of “Tonight’s dreams brought to you by Percocet” but figured it would be better suited in a daylog.
To make a long story short, I had to have a couple of teeth yanked out last week and after the procedure was over I was given about 30 Percocet’s to help me ease through the discomfort I was destined to face in the coming days. I’ve heard some of my friends swear by this stuff so I figured that there’d be no harm in taking them. After all, during my youth I was veritable proving ground for the latest and greatest pharmaceuticals and figured any side effects would be no big deal.
Well let me tell ya, I was wrong, so fuckin’ wrong in fact that I wound up giving most of them away to folks who might appreciate that kind of high more that I did.
The first day I took them was sorta okay. All I felt was a sort of dull mellow feeling as I laid on my couch and flipped through the channels with the remote. But then, as the night drew near I popped a couple more to help me sleep.
Big mistake.
I’m not big on recalling dreams or determining their hidden meaning but these fuckers were so vivid I couldn’t tell if I was asleep or awake. I’d wake up every 10 or 15 minutes drenched in sweat but the dreams themselves seemed to go on forever. I even think I was able to recreate them in some kind of weird stream of consciousness way and I couldn’t tell where one left off and another one started. I’m pretty sure most of them had to do circumstances that occurred in the past but that now how some kind of new, sordid, morbid twist to it.
So the next day I decided to Google the side effects of Percocet’s and much to my relief found that I wasn’t alone. The internet is awash with people who had experienced the same thing that I did and while that didn’t do anything to relieve me of my plight at least I knew I wasn’t alone. Supposedly, these dreams will only last for a few days or so until the shit gets out of my system.
Speaking of shit, while perusing the other side effects of using Percocet I discovered that another one is constipation.
Great.
Now I don’t want to sleep for fear that my deepest darkest fears will come calling during the night and I haven’t taken a decent dump in days.
The only life lesson that I’ve learned from this little escapade is that the next time I’m able to choose my own poison I’m gonna do a bit of homework first.
What a way to start 2012.