My mother and I were coming home for the grocery store today, when while on the freeway we saw a car crash to the shoulder. It was unattended and it seemed as if some people were trapped inside one of the cars. This being the case, my mom instucted me to call 911 on the emergency cell phone we keep in the glove compartment.

So I dial up trusty 911, press send and it begins to ring. And ring. And ring. It rings 12 times before I get a response. And what a lovely response it was.

"Thank you for calling 911 emergency assistance. All our operators are currently busy, please remain calm and stay on the line. We appreciate your patience."

I hung up the phone, after losing all the respect I used to hold for the "life saving" community. Got a mad rapist after you? Did you lose your arm? Is your house on fire? Give us 15 minutes and we'll see what we can do. Fantastic.