We lied to you before; the truth
didn't matter to you then.
The world is getting closer every day. I anxiously prepare for college applications
, SAT II
's, and scholarship essay
contests. Every day brings me closer to away and I love the feeling. Sure, I probably won't get into a good college, and I probably won't ever see my girlfriend again after she goes to China
, but at least i'll be living my own life. A life that doesn't have a shot clock
on it. A life which isn't bound by artifical rules imposed by in loco parentis
or Voodoo Education
I have huge fears that I won't get accepted to a good school, let alone Yale
where my girlfriend is more or less destined to end up. Everyone always wants a 'Fresh Start'. I can understand that, I just don't like being thrown away
. Is there anything I can do about this? Not really. I can cross my fingers and say a prayer, try to find God and see if we're still cool. I can hope that some kind reader will realise that, hey, this guy is really bright. I can write a damn good essay. Then again, maybe i'm destined to live a life unlived. I don't know.
It's kind of sad that we're born in the grave
. You have to claw your way out into the world from the time you're born. You have to work hard to make yourself something other than a statistic
used to attain federal money. It use to be different, back before the death of the last great primitive ideal, a man was born and that was that. I think it was better then. But, as John Dos Passos
said, I paraphrase: We look to the past because the present sucks