There I was, sitting in a large vat of brine, way past my prime pickle days. In fact, you could say that I was starting to become a rancid_pickle. I could've just stayed there in that discarded vat at the abandoned pickle factory in Brooklyn, New York, or I could do something about it.

It was at this low point in my pickley life that I ran across this node on Everything2 using my FutureCastTM television invention that allowed me to see things in the past that I would encounter in the future. I thought to myself, "Whoa, a picklevator is an interesting concept for a rapidly deteriorating cucumber!"

So I bobbed around until I found two sturdy stems and jabbed them into my squishy body. I decided to randomly call these things "arms". Them I felt around and found two larger stems and attached them to my lower half and randomly called these things "legs". It turned out I was lucky with my naming convention because at the time I only spoke cucumber language, which consisted of a single word: "GROW!"

Eventually, this node helped me to become a prolific writer and noder on Everything2 and to develop friendships with a lot of awesome folks who only give me upvotes and chings. Those folks are the best in the universe and I wish them all of the wonderfulness that the pickle deities and human deities can provide.

Iron Noder 2017