Normally, I like to wear things that are comfortable. I shop at the local thrift store, though sometimes I buy jeans from places like Sears or J.C. Penny. A lot of my wardrobe is souvenir t-shirts from places I've been or things I've done. I have short hair, and I don't wear jewelry. And lately, my friends have been telling me I look gay.

To me this seems strange. I am not gay. I have nothing against gay people, of course. I'm just not one.

My mother tells me that the things I wear are "too masculine" looking, and that I should be careful not to fit into the gay stereotypical look.

You need to wear more jewelry, they tell me, maybe wear some tighter shirts or a little makeup. This irritates me. I've been wearing the same clothes I've always worn, and now all of a sudden, I'm gay-looking. Should I suffer to wear paint on my face and uncomfortable clothing just to appeal to someone else's idea of what's "gay"?

It's irritating how they get so worried about gayness. Your lesbian factor is a little too high, Damian -- better put on a bracelet or a necklace. Better wear a v-neck shirt and blue eyeshadow. I mean, what do they think is going to happen to me if I look gay? At least I won't have horny assholes grabbing my butt and whistling loudly when I walk by.

All this sexual image crap makes me wonder if the benefits of an asexual society might be greater than the detriments. I mean, we'd probably miss the thrill of romance and love and lust if we divided like cells to reproduce. But think of all the pain that would be avoided and all the technological and intellectual advances that could be made if sex didn't exist.