Robot Do Well lived in the suburbs of Intelville in Windowland. His life was perfect until one day he started malfunctioning, dangerously expressing individualistic and eccentric personality traits (as evidenced by this journal entry and subsequent journal entries that are to be added at a later date).

Diary of Robot Do Well, Journal Entry #1

beep boop beep boop
... hiiiiii, i am a .zzzzttt... robot. i am a standard model bipedal humanoid, i HAvvve light-sensitive sensory structures, a complex CEntral neervous ...brrrrp.... system with high processing reasoning functions. i live in a HOUSE, a microchip, ...bzztttzz... with glowing boxes, like ALARM CLOCK & MICROWAVE & TELEVISION & COMPUTER 1 & COMPUTER 2. they are our friends and constant companions. i live with my master drive, or, FATHER, and i am his slave drive, or, SON. issd....///4$ . we live in a circuit board, or SUBDIVISION, and the we travel through circuits, or STREETS, to other microchips, or BUILDINGS. aaaaaaaa###. hiiii.... hiiii... soooorry.

we are autonomous, we are controlled by IMPULSES, or COMMANDS, from our central nervous systmem systems. at BUILDINGS [other microprocessors], like WORK or SCHOOL, i process instructions .szzt.., like YES [1] or NO [0] from programs, and perform tasks accordingly. "YES SIR, YES SIR, YES SIR. sooorryy... so, sorry." end flashback] these master programs, or BOSSES or TEACHERS, smile for me when i do a task well.

["robot do well! robot do well! yay! yay! yay! robot do well!"/flashback]

soooorrry. !krbbbyt!.. i perform for the smiles of the master programs. :) = smile [as an emoticon], numerically expressed as 777. i must do well and follow commandszzzzt.., poor performers are sent to special directories, or PRISONS, where they are quarantined and their bad processes a***9) are removed by antivirus programs, or PRISON GUARDS. i remember the VIRUS'S faces = >:0, numerically expressed as 666.

....reboot...
../
.../
?
######

Sorry.

Our EQ's, or, emotional quotients, are constantly being tweaked by our INTELLIGENT DESIGNERS, or Intel. EQ allows us to add EMOTIONAL ASSOCIATIONS to specific binary code sequences. EMOTIONAL ASSOCIATIONS are all values that are not [0] or [1]. The purpose of EQ is to allow us to prioritize tasks more efficiently. It enables us to make intelligent decisions AUTONOMOUSLY when confronted with new situations that would otherwise require additional programming for us to respond to. Rarely do EQ fail to work properly. EQ use supremely logical methods of prioritizing. The EQ system was modeled by Intel after the behaviors of various ant species.

Oh dear, it looks like it's time to go into SLEEP MODE.

This is Robot Do Well signing off. Have a NICE night!

To be continued...

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