I feel so much like an animated machine
of myself, and the way I move
Is so predictable
…but I guess that’s what happens when you fall.
It’s always easier to see the sunset from a high plateau
, but that
Doesn’t mean that I’m willing to climb.
I wish I could climb into a great big box and close the lid over me…
Someone threatened me with that, once…hush, he said,
Or I’ll put you in a box…just as we passed the throbbing clubs,
And I laughed and told him no, and secretly wished he would.
I dreamt about being a candle
, that other night,
And I smelled of lavender
and sandalwood, and state of mind…
Infinite dancers with colored ribbons, the planet
s they are, someone told me
And I believed him, looking distantly into the stars, and
I know that I will never find my way back to that island
in the south,
And I whisper, why can’t you come to me? and feel full of despair,
Combining that which I always knew to that which I always feared…
Little red circles, she cried, nothing, nothing but little red circles…
And where is the wine
when I need it?