Ring ring ring...ring ring ring...
Hello, you have reached Large ISP. My name is Technician and my Badge Number is 2323. How can I help you?
My computer...it can't get on the internet!
Hmmm. And how long has this been happening?
Since I switched to you guys!
And how long ago was that?
Earlier today. And now I can't get onto the internet, and I have an important e-Mail from my Aunt Sadie...
Okay, where exactly does the issue with getting on the internet start? Can you dial in?
I try to open up the AOL icon but nothing happens!
So you switched over from AOL?
Yes, and this never happened on AOL!
Okay, well, we will try to see if we can get you connected...go up to My Computer and double click on it. Now, tell me what you see.
Um, there is a CDin there. A little picture of a CD that says Large ISP. I just clicked on it, but nothing is happening.
mkay...Let's cancel out of there, and go to Dial Up...
You know, it was when I put the CD in that my computer first started making the noises
Yeah, and kind smelling funny.
Yeah, like smoke.
Smoke...mkay, I think I know what is happening. It looks like your computer may be experiencing combustion related issues. Now, this is a coincidence that this happened after installing our software, but it looks like your computers hardware is having melting issues.
Well...what can you do for me? This never happened on AOL!
Well, I am not a combustion technician myself, but I can give you a toll free number to reach a call center that can deploy combustion related issue technicians directly to your home, for free. The number is 911...do you have that?
Are these people part of Large ISP?
No, the are an independent organization that specializes only to help people with these type of issues. You should call them up, and once they have solved your issues, you can call us up to get on the internet
Okay, before you go, do you want your call ticket number?
Do I have to give it to these 911 people?
Um, no. Thank you for call...