Airports aren't the only place you have to deal with security and metal
detectors.
I have on my key chain a knife I use to open all the boxes
I get in the
mail at work containing cool computer parts. This knife is one of those
imitation miniature swiss army knives that
they pass out at conventions
with somebody's logo on it that rubs off in a few weeks if you carry it all
the time.
Anyway, this knife is not nearly quite as sharp as your average dull
letter opener, and about two inches long (the case, the blade is shorter).
It does a good job on cellophane tape, though.
Anyway, I got called on jury duty. They had installed metal detectors
at the courthouse about a year earlier because an annoyed defendant
decided that the judge and lots of other people deserved the contents
of his gun after the jury convicted him.
The first day, anticipating a long
boring day in the waiting room, I brought a bag full of books to study,
and for some reason dumped my keys in with the books. The whole thing
went through the X-ray machine when I came in, when I went out for lunch,
when I came back for lunch, etc... Towards the end of the first day,
I was put on a panel and then actually selected for a jury.
So, the second day, I came without the book bag. I go through the
metal detector, without emptying my pockets, since my wallet full of
change hadn't set it off the previous day. BEEEP BEEP BEEP!! Ho boy.
I get converged on by three bailiffs, for whom this obviously was the
high point of their day. No, silently walking through the detector
without my keys wasn't good enough. Out come the wands, one each.
Meanwhile, here I am, emptying my pockets (a little late) into their
basket. Of course, the wands show nothing. But then they see the stupid
two inch knife on my key ring that would bend and break if I tried to
cut myself with it. Boy did they freak!! You'd think I brought in a
machine gun or something. For a moment there, I thought they were going
to cuff me or something. I was a juror, not a suspect!!
I had even brought it in
(through the x-ray machine) repeatedly the day before.
Anyway, one of the bailiff's very reluctantly confiscated it (rather than
destroying it or arresting me, which they would have liked better,
I'm sure), and I got it back on my way home. Since then, I've always
been extremely paranoid about what's on my key ring when I anticipate
metal detectors.
I suppose this is nothing in comparison to the reaction my Uncle got
when he accidently brought his tools of the trade into a court house
to pay a traffic ticket. (He worked for a meat packing plant. What he
didn't give a second thought to was probably not close to street legal,
let alone accepted in a court house.)
IMHO, the airports should have a vending machine full of prepaid mailing tubes
right next to the metal detectors. If they find something they won't
let you take, you should be able to pop it in a mailing tube, address it
to yourself, and drop it in the mailbox next to the vending machine.
No fuss, no loss. It would make everyone happy, and probably give
the airport a few more pennies.
2004 update: I saw an article in the paper that someone is now doing exactly this. Vending machine full of postage pre-paid padded envelopes next to the metal detector. Hmmf. And they didn't even give me credit.