I found out yesterday that my grandfather is dying. We'll be visiting him next week to say our goodbyes; he's not in the hospital yet, or anything, but everyone knows his time is coming. I don't know how I'm going to react. He was always so kind to me, and encouraging. I never would've thought that someone his age would encourage me to go into programming, or game design. Hell, if I told him about maybe wanting to write a bit on the side, he'd probably say that that's cool, and ask about my ideas for his stories.
I suppose, in the back of my head, I always wanted him to be around and see the things I'd make. Now he won't be. And it's more than a little upsetting.
I've stonefaced multiple breakups. I managed to not cry when my pet turtle had to be given away as we moved overseas; he was the first pet I had ever owned. I can usually be strong in the face of adversity, but this is my first time I'll be faced with someone I know and love dying.
I hope my mental wall finally breaks, and I cry. He deserves the tears. He is a good man, a kind man.
I think I'll dedicate a book to him, or put a memorial in a game. Whichever I make first.