Mom is always looking for some way to get me to lose weight. Now, I don't think I'm that much overweight; I think I'm about right for a woman my age (plus or minus a bit), but apparently she doesn't think so. Today, she took me to the mall and bought me herbal diet pills. Okay, I think, I could stand to lose a bit of my tummy, and if not now, then when? After all, losing weight only gets tougher as you get older, and I'm gaining about ten pounds a year. And my two younger sisters are quite a bit thinner than I am, and I would like to borrow their clothes now and then.

But diet pills? They are herbal, but it seems a little weird to me. Isn't that like buying your daughter speed? However, I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. I learned a long time ago (during my freshman year in college) that anytime you can get something for nothing - a meal, some clothes, disk space - you shouldn't ask questions. So I'll try the herbal diet pill thing for a while and see what happens. I think I can handle it; I won't abuse them or anything. So stay tuned for a real life testimonial; let's see if these things really work.

Added Later: I know that "herbal" does not mean "safe" (see Does "All Natural" Mean "No Side Effects"?) I don't want you all to think that I'm a complete idiot. However, I know enough people who've taken this particular pill over a period of years, and they are still perfectly healthy human beings (and a bit thinner, to boot). Yes, I know, I know, "long-term effects" can exist, but hey, do you know what the "long-term effects" of obesity are? Heart disease, high cholesterol, asthma, cancer, and, ultimately, death. I'll take my chances.