I could put some esoteric, philosophical crap about greed being good, or there's nothing like a fresh paycheck, or something like that. But that's not the issue. What I want to know is...

What the hell is that smell? It's like no other smell in the world. It's like, cloth, ink, sweat, dirt... all rolled into one... but it's got an added, unknown element. A conglomerate, an amalgamation, if you will, of unknown smells that gives American paper money its unique smell.

I think that paper money picks up its smell from other pieces of paper money. Because when you get a brand new bill, it doesn't smell quite like an old bill. Oh yes, the smell is there, but it's not as deep. It needs to be with other bills, sharing the smell, until it's saturated.

I mean somewhere in America, right now, there's a fin that just got pissed on, a sawbuck covered with Gerber baby food, and a Benjamin covered with cigar ash. And they get stowed away in a wallet with all of the other bills, bills that have been passed from person to person, slid into vending machines, and left as tips in puddles of warm beer and Zima.

I think this is where the smell comes from... the unique smell of American paper money.