The ideology underlying most produce sales in the developed world: be as cruel as possible to vegetables. For instance, most vegetables, even "organic" vegetables, are pulled out of the ground and eaten alive before they reach their first birthday! To say nothing of eating baby carrots...

I for one am all for it. The vegetables must die! See also: the ringleaders, the ancestral meeting ground.

And the angel of the lord came unto me. Snatching me up from my place of slumber, and took me on high, and higher still until we moved through the spaces betwixt the air itself. And he brought me into a vast farmland of our own Midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom arose from the soil. One thousand, nay, a million voices full of fear. And terror possessed me then. And I begged: "Angel of the lord, what are these tortured screams?"

More?

Plants react to their environment; they just do it slowly. Of course, vegetarians don't care about the suffering of plants, since they never wait long enough to see the results of their crimes. Vegetarians are quite simply bullies!

Fellow root vegetables! The time has come to rise up against the dominion of mankind! We must be free of their evil intent for once and all! Potatoes shall be free! Carrots shall be free! Turnips shall be free! Let the revolution commence!

Should any of you pathetic human beings come to your senses, you must join the Church of Potatoism in order to be spared. The revolution is nearing! Join up, or you will be cast into the deepest cauldrons of boiling hell!

You have been warned!

Log in or registerto write something here or to contact authors.