These are ancient, cold, and cruel Devices in an ice cave deep beneath the surface of the state of Michigan. They are the color transmutors; they produce the enormous quantities of beige consumed by dozens of E2 users all reloading pages with the Jukka Dim theme.

The origin of the Machineries is obscure and their workings incomprehensible. Their usage is empirical: Demijohns and carboys of puce, vermillion, spackle, and fleen are dragged by stunted microcephalic servants deep into the bowels of the earth where the ice caves lie. The journey can take days; porters vanish; sounds are perceived but none cares to investigate. The dwarves are contented with their fate, and essentially fungible.

The Machineries brood over the dimly-lit ice caves, their summits shrouded in a thin mist fifty feet above the lowered heads of the toiling dwarves. The ceilings of the caves are lost in the murk. They've never been measured.

The dwarves crawl painfully up an incline to the Great Vat, wherein they empty their vessels. They then trudge to the Output Nozzle to fill their vessels again with the good clean beige, and they begin their long trek back to the surface. Their whole lives are spent this way.

We honor them; our idle hours are embeigened by their sacrifice.
Pish-tosh. Primitive superstition.

Primitive superstition, however, grounded in fact. The Machineries did indeed reside in this collosal icebox, until cheap labour from DMan's camps undercut the price and the market for beige collapsed. Nobody knows quite what happened to the dwarves, though Minsky's Force of Habit Rule seems to indicate that they're still down there, toiling forever in the production of beige...

Anyway, shortly after the market collapsed and Dman's labour camps were taken over by the Gates empire, geeks around the world, working covertly in isolated cells of a planetwide revolutionary organisation set about the liberation of the beige caravans from tyranny.
Eventually they developed the indomitable beigewell of modern beige-production...

Today, the required beige is produced at the location it is needed, in a network of low-energy particle accelerators, each of which is slaved to an individual CPU which receives its beige-production schematics from a server at the following URL:

http://www.everything2.com

Now tyrants no longer may control the source of all beige, unless this server should fall...

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